I'd Rather Die
by Midna Hytwilian
Summary: Claire's an average teenaged girl with an odd group of friends named Xander, Crims, Rai, and Chad. But when Vaati shows up in her room in the middle of the night how normal will she stay? Conspiracies just might help change her life.
1. The Gods Hate My Guts

Disclaimer: All I own is The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time (part 1)...in other words I just got the first LOZ manga book yesterday. Oh and a tri-force necklace. ;)

A/N: Told you it'd come soon. Check out the homepage for a BG later. School started today...it was alright. I can't wait till I get the second OOT book. Actually I can't wait till I get them ALL.

* * *

Title: I'd Rather Die

Preview of chapter: I never really liked villians and dreamed of slaying dragons and other childish fantasies. Of course life sorta throws things at you. I just guess the gods really hate my guts.

Chapter 1. The God's Really Hate My Guts

* * *

He was defeated once more and sighed heavily at this. Again, again he was going to be defeated. Sucked into that damn Four Sword to wait until some moron would pull it out. Which could be never, he was lucky someone pulled it out once and he doubted someone would make the same mistake.

Expecting to arrive in that tight space that was black and seemed endless he was more then shocked by what he faced. He was in a room of some sort, filled with items he never had seen before. At first he presumed that he was in the far future and that someone had pulled the sword out. Until he realized that he had never arrived in that terrible endless black that even he could not explain.

The room was pink and despite not knowing what most of these items were, he presume it was a female's room. There were two doors. One that had a small window on top and another that was a simple plain door. Sure he could have just left the room and figure out just where the hell he was. And he was just about to do that...until he spotted it.

Nearby a bed-which had a lump under the blankets-sat a small table and in a clear box sat the golden power he had been searching for. Mind you he had almost obtained this power, hadn't it been for Link and his damn clones, and was more then excited to see it before him. His for the taking! All that work had paid off. Link thought he had done Hyrule a favor but whatever he had done would be the downfall of that land.

Slowly he walked over to the box, eager to have the power in his hands. He was more then shocked when a girlish scream was let lose and brown eyes met his crimson eyes.

"Who the hell are you?! Get out of my house! MOM, DAD, HELP!" The female shrieked, she sat up now revealing a pink ruffled top that only covered her top and stopped at the neckline, along with blue pants.

He scoffed at the situation, so a few lives had to be taken out? No problem for him. A flick of his wrist and they'd all be dead. Of course he became panicked when she wasn't turned into stone. Or when an energy ball wasn't let lose. Spell after spell and nothing came, footsteps were sounding outside the door and finally it was opened.

A middle-aged man and woman ran in brandishing bats and stopped when they saw the intruder.

The girl got up from her bed and ran over to them, crying into their shirts.

"Who are you and how did you get in?" The man barked out.

"It's alright honey, we'll call the cops and they'll take care of this." The woman soathed.

The girl glared at him, "I-I thi-nk I know who he is..."

How could his life go from perfect to hell in just two minutes?

"B-b-but I don't know how..."

"Who is he?"

He opened his mouth to speak but was cut off.

"V-v-va-" She stopped and tried again. "Vaati."

"Who?"

He smirked at the fact that this girl knew his name and seemed to tremble at it. "Vaati, The Sorcerer of Winds."

The bats came down abit in confusion. "He's not a friend you had come over just to scare us, is he?"

The girl shook her head no. "I-I..." she fainted.

The bats went up again. "Alright kid, who the fuck are you and what are you doing here?"

He glared at them, "Don't call me that again."

"Go call the cops." The man instructed his wife.

She ran off to do so until the girl sat up, concious once again.

"Mom don't he can kill you!"

"At least someone here understands my power."

"Alright that's it, just what the fuck is going on?!" The father shouted.

"This." The girl stood up now and rummaged through items. Finally she pulled something out and handed it to them.

"Minish Cap? What the hell does that game we got you last week have to do with anything?" Her mother asked, looking at the item with distaste.

_Minish cap? What do they know about my Wishing Hat? _Vaati thought to himself.

"Umm..." She looked around frantically and pulled out a pile of papers. She handed them to the adults.

They looked from the papers to Vaati, looks of curiousity and worry. "You drew him."

"Drew me?" Vaati snatched the papers from their hands and looked at them and then the girl.

"My friend paid me ten bucks to draw them for her. I have to give them to her." She glared at him more.

The adults gulped as they looked at Vaati. "Family meeting." The father choked out and left the room.

* * *

"Alright who's this Vaati guy?" Mr. Johninson asked as the family sat at a table downstairs.

"He's a bad guy in the game. I haven't gotten too far." The girl explained.

"You said he could kill us." Mrs. Johninson stated.

"He's a sorcerer. He turned Zelda into stone in the beginning of the game."

"Well what the fuck are we to do with him?!" The mother became paniced.

"I hate his guts alright? I'd love to call the cops but that doesn't seem too smart. I just say we hope he won't kill us and try our best to get him out of here."

"I got to admit, that's a good idea." Her father congratulated her.

* * *

Vaati was more then confused at his situation. How had they known about him and his cap? Why weren't his powers working? Where was he? How could he get back? And where the hell was that box?!

The door flung open to reveal the family again. The girl seemed to be very hostile around him, despite the fact that she also seemed to fear him. "Look we're not going to do anything. We don't want any trouble, all we want is for you to leave."

"Where am I?"

"San Francisco. I highly doubt you know where that is." She scoffed.

"Don't press your luck, girl."

"Don't hurt her, please." The mother pleaded.

"I apologize." She muttered, under her cool calm and stern face was a nervous look. She was obviously very afraid.

"Seeing as how I need information, I'll leave you alone."

"Anything else before you leave?"

"How do you know about me?'

"Complicated, rather not say."

Her parents slapped her on the head, urging her not to anger him and be a fool.

"I don't think you'd want to hear it almighty Vaati." Sarcasm bit at her words.

"I think I would."

She cringed, "I-I-I heard about you and the Picori Festival. I study alot."

The first attempt at stealing the golden power...

"And my apperance?"

"Um...picture?"

He scoffed at that, not even Link knew his apperance. Then again he thought Link had the intellegence of a five year-old Moblin.

"Tell the truth or I'll hurt you."

The family gulped.

"A game." Her father stated.

He furrowed his eyebrows, "Game?"

"Please don't make me explain." She whispered.

"Very well. Continue,"

"Ask me another question."

Vaati glared at her, "How can I get back?"

Her expression was of confusion. "Why do you mean how do you get back? Your a sorcerer you can just use your powers!"

He cursed at himself inwardly knowing he shouldn't have asked that.

Her expression changed from confusion to amusement. "You can't get back cause your powers are gone aren't they?" She began laughing, "There really is a god. Good, you deserve it."

Her parents seemed to soften up. "He's stuck here and has nowhere to go."

She caught on quickly, "He's a villian! Are you guys crazy? He should be turned in."

"The cops wouldn't believe us."

"Urgh, you're right. Well then he should just go. I'm sure he can manage on his own."

"He's only about your age."

"I am not a child." Vaati muttered.

"Well you're the height of one." The parents protested.

"My height is perfectly fine!"

The girl laughed harder, "You're pratically a midget."

"You look young."

"Well I can't help the fact that damn sword seems to stop my aging...although I should be happy about that."

"Come on, we can just knock him unconcious and drop him off in the alley." The girl coaxed.

"Lay a finger on me and I'll-"

"Do what? You can't use magic." She gave a smug look.

"You're infuriating, if I had my powers I'd kill you."

"Good thing you don't."

"Wench."

"Bastard."

"Bitch."

"Dick."

The parents glared at the Wind Mage and girl. "We're still here."

"Fudge." She sighed.

He rolled his eyes, "I have no care."

"Can we just get him out of here? Throw him out a window for all I care."

"I'm not going to jail because we drop him off in somewhere and someone thinks we're abandoing him." Her father stated.

"URGH I AM NOT LIVING WITH A SORCERER! ARE YOU GUYS INSANE?"

"We're just thinking of what could happen if we didn't keep him here."

"What if his powers come back huh? He'd kill us."

"They can't come back soon enough."

"Oh shut up!"

"The minute I get th-"

"See?!?!"

"Well you're not really being nice."

"Mom!"

"Mothers know best."

"You kept your nose out of this!"

The bickering went on, back and forth until the parents grabbed the bats menicingly.

"He can sleep in the guest room tonight. We'll sort this out tomorrow."

She glared at Vaati, "Fine."

"Don't kill each other." They ordered.

"I promise I won't kill an evil villian, can't say he'll make the same promise of no murder."

"I promise not to murder this moron, tonight."

"Hey!"

The parents groaned as they went back to their bed, hoping it was all a dream.

For a minute the two just stood there, glaring at each other. Until of course the last question was asked. "Where's the force?"

"Force?" She laughed.

"Yes the force, girl. Where the hell is it?"

"The TRI-force?" She coughed out from her laughing fit.

"Yes the tri-force. Where did you put it?!" His patience was wearing thin. Vaati never really was a patient person.

"I don't have the tri-force you moron. It's a necklace." She picked the small box up from between her bed and the table. "See?" She opened it up.

"A replica. Damn it..."

"Wow you're stupid."

"It was dark!"

"Sure, just get out of my room alright? I'm exhausted." She gave a little yawn.

"Where is that guest room?"

She glared at him, "Down the hall. I'm not going to show you if that's what you think I'm going to do."

"You better hope I don't get my powers back."

"And you better hope I don't decide to commit murder."

"What is your name, girl?" He asked out of curiousity.

"Claire. Now get the hell out."

"Hmph."

Vaati left the room, disappointed in the loss of his powers and the fact that it was not the force.

Claire laid on her bed, staring at the ceiling and spoke to herself as if speaking to a phsyicitrist. "I never really liked villians and dreamed of slaying dragons and other childish fantasies. Of course life sorta throws things at you. I just guess the gods really hate my guts. God do I hate Vaati. He's so selfish in the game and it doesn't take a genius to figure out that he's the same out of the game. I hope it's all a bad dream..."

* * *

A/N: Sorry if Vaati is a bit OOC. I've only read a bit of the manga online and a fanfiction. I find him to be a cool villian. He's my fave Zelda villian. ANYWHO...moving on. Um...OH sorry if it's a bit boring right now or seems a bit fake. Claire is not a Mary-Sue. She'll have her flaws like everyone else. It was really hard to write this chap. I thought about this idea last night when I was putting my necklace into this clear little box and was thinking, "Well what if Vaati didn't get sealed into the sword and instead met this girl who hated his guts?" Thus this was born. I've never played the game but I know how it goes. This is NOT a self-insert, trust me. Although she has abit of the same apperance but the only reason why is because it's a contridictuory. Vaati's very pale and reminds me of winter. While I'm pretty tanned and warm looking. Which I remind myself of summer. This'll have a plot.

I dedicate this story to SoulDragon12.

Is it really rape if you enjoyed it?

* * *


	2. Questioning Idioticy

Disclaimer: Alright I'm pissed, therefore...(Snaps fingers and room is transformed into a throne room, sits upon a golden throne with skulls below it, wearing a bright neon green slender dress.) I've changed from author to AUTHORESS. Therefore I still own nothing but I can now do this...(snaps fingers and lifts a reader up, tosses them into a chair) Enjoy the show. (Sinister cackling)

A/N: It's storming and there's lost of wind, hint the reason why I'm writing this. ^_^

If you don't review I'll be forced to say **it** and you don't want me doing **that** to you, do you?

* * *

Title: I'd Rather Die

Preview of chapter: Yeah that's a smart idea, leave your only child home alone with a power crazed Wind Mage. Brilliant!

Chapter 2. Questioning Idioticy

* * *

Claire awoke to her cellphone going off, The Hell Song continued to play as she sleepily picked up the phone. With a yawn she answered, "Claire speaking. How may I assist you?"

"Ello govenor, wanted to make sure coming over was still alright with your parents. I got the movie you wanted." A female's voice chirped.

She looked at her clock to see that it was nine am. "Ugrh, too early...must sleep. Leave. Alone." She grunted as she began to get back into the bed.

"No way are you getting back to sleep, Claire. I'm going away to Summer Camp in just TWO days, we've got time to spend together!" The girl sounded near the point of tears.

"Damn it, fine just give me an hour alright? I want to be up when you get here."

"Sweet! Be there in an hour and a HALF. I have someone I want you to meet and I have to c-"

"You are not bringing someone over! My parents will kill me if you do." She hissed.

"Alright, alright, fine. Worry wart. An hour then."

"Talk to you later."

"TTYL?"

"No text speak!"

And the phone was hung up. Grungily the female stood back up and grabbed out a pair of clothes. She exited her room and walked into the bathroom, locking the door behind her. After a quick shower and blow drying her hair, she came out of the bathroom fully dressed and suddenly her face paled.

"Oh dear god please let that have been a nightmare." She muttered as she quietly walked over to the guest room.

Slowly she opened the door and cursed, "Fuck it wasn't a nightmare!"

There lying in the bed was the Wind Mage himself, sprawled across he tended up to take the whole bed.

Her face paled again, "Sarah!" She ran to grab her phone when the doorbell rang.

The cellphone rang again and she gulped. Slowly she picked it up. "Sarah?"

"Yeah sorry, I sorta got kicked out of the house because I plugged up the toilet so I'm outside now."

"Er...well I don't think that's a good idea."

"What's the matter? You sound worried."

"It seems that my parents forgot to tell me we have a guest over."

"Oh who is the person? Think they'll want to watch the movie?"

"I highly doubt he will."

A loud bang was heard followed by a string of curses. No doubt Vaati was up.

"Who was that?"

"That would be the devil himself."

"Oh come on the guy can't be that bad."

"He's bad. Look we'll have to reschedule this alright?"

"Fine. I'll be over at Jessica's if you change your mind. And if you lose your virginity, I didn't know about him."

"SARAH!" She wailed into the phone as it was hung up. Claire began stomping her way over to the guest room and flung the door open.

Calmly she pointed at the Wind Mage. "Alright I want answers right now, buddy. How the fuck did you get to my house and why can't you leave?"

"I do not know how I got here, if I did know then I wouldn't be here!" Vaati stated, rubbing the left side of his head.

"What happened?" Claire asked out of curiousity.

"I banged my damn head on that table."

"Serves you right."

"Must you have a grudge against me, girl?"

"Well you've done alot of messed up things. I just hope this is the gods way of punishing you."

He pointed his finger at her, shaking in rage. "If I ha-"

"That's starting to get old now."

"You're infuriating!"

"As are you." She turned and left the room, calling out for her mother and father. Slowly she looked out a window to find their cars missing. "Yeah that's a smart idea, leave your only child home with a power crazed Wind Mage. Brilliant!"

Another string of curses were let loose after a bang.

"What now?" Claire called out.

"I stubbed my toe!"

"Klutz!"

She rubbed the bridge of her nose, "Today's going to be a long day..."

* * *

A/N: ^-^ Poor Vaati keeps hurting himself.

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	3. Hope You're Laughing

Disclaimer: Tingle...owns...my soul...please...save me.

A/N HELP!

* * *

Title: I'd Rather Die

Preview of Chapter: And here I was thinking you were a moron.

Chapter 3 Hope You're Laughing

* * *

Claire sat across the Wind Mage in the dinning room, slowly eatting her pancakes as he looked down at them with a grimmace.

"Are you going to eat or look at them like they're shit?" She finally piped up.

"You didn't poison mine, correct?"

"I'm not a murderer."

"Very well..." Vaati scrunched his nose and took a bite.

"Well?"

"It's...eattable."

"And here I was thinking you were a moron."

"Wench."

"Cold hearted bastard."

"Whore."

"Oh you did NOT just call me a whore."

"What are you going to do about it?"

"This." She smirked and stood up.

Vaati furrowed his eyebrows as she took the syrup and walked over to him. "What are you doing?"

She began pouring the susbstance ontop of him. "This." Claire repeated.

He stood up in rage. "Look what you did! I'm all sticky now!"

"Serves you right."

"To Stone With You!" He shouted as he pointed his finger at her.

As expected, nothing happened.

She gave him a confused look. "What the hell were you hoping to accomplish?"

Vaati frowned, "I was just hoping..."

Claire looked at his now covered in syrup form. She sighed, "Look I apologize about the syrup but you just get me so damn frustrated. I'll get you a change of clothes and you can go shower."

"Shower? What the bloody hell is a shower?"

"It's a certain type of bathing."

"I have a few questions about this world."

"And we'll get to those later on. Let me get you a towel and go set the shower up, upstairs alright?" With that said she walked up the stairs and came back with a towel, sounds of rushing water heard from the second floor. "Alright shower's all set!" She smiled.

With a blank expression he followed her up the stairs and into the bathroom where sure enough a bathtub stood with a turned on shower head.

"Washcloth's on the side for you, when you're done I'll wash your clothes. You owe me."

"I owe you nothing, hadn't it of been for you we wouldn't be in this situation."

"It's barely a situation at all. Just get in the damn shower!" Fuming she stomped out and went back to her room where she turned on a computer. "Please be on, please be on, please be on."

An AIM chat was opened.

**DekuGuy: **yo wht's up, C?

**Cfox: **Chad can I borrow a pair of clothes?

**DekuGuy:** ...

**Cfox:** CHAD I'M SERIOUS!

**DekuGuy:** chill C! Jesus why dp u need guy clohes?

*do

*clothes

**Cfox:** I have a guy over and things got messy...

**DekuGuy: **C are u nts?! U had sex with a strnger?!

**Cfox: **DOES ALL OF MY FRIENDS THINK I'M SOME WHORE?

**DekuGuy: **1. u mean do all of my friend think I'm some whore. 2. O.o

**Cfox: **;ook I did not have sex. I poired syrup pn him.

**DekuGuy: **Lucy u gots lotsa explainin's ta do.

**DekuGuy has signed out of AIM**

Claire frowned a she too signed out. For a minute all she did was sit infront of the computer screen, wondering what she should do while she wait. Suddenly she sprung up and grabbed a Gameboy. After the usual opening sounds, music, and spending a few seconds remembering what was next, she began playing from her saved spot on Minish Cap.

"If I'm going to be with nutjob for awhile, I might as well know all there is to know."

* * *

A/N: Explination for why she couldn't call Chad: Some people cannot be called at certain times-perhaps their parents are watching a show and they'll get introuble for it getting interrupted-therefore AIMing is a sollution.

Next chapter we meet DekuGuy, also known as Chad. I hate making spelling errors but I had to. It's chat, of course errors will happen.

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	4. The Deku Boy Meets the Wind Mage

* * *

Disclaimer: =D

A/N: ... 8D

* * *

Title: I'd Rather Die

Preview of chapter: I am not a fucking whore!

Chapter 4. The Deku Boy Meets the Wind Mage

* * *

After about five to seven minutes of waiting for Chad to arrive the doorbell rang. Immediatly she ran down the stairs, her Gameboy in her hands.

"C open up!" Chad's voice sounded from behind the door.

She unlocked the door and opened it where sure enough a blond haired boy with green eyes walked in, wearing a shirt with the Twitter logo. But instead of the usual logo it said, "Twitterwhore."

Claire rolled her eyes. "You got clothes right?"

"Yeah they're in my pack." He took off a backpack and unzippered it, revealing a clean package of underwear, a package of clean socks, a black shirt that read in white "Come to the Darkside we have cookies", and a pair of white jeans.

"Why'd you bring the underwear and socks? Not that I'm complaining..."

"Well incas-"

"I am not a fucking whore!"

"I know but the way you worded it..."

"Look I'm not a whore. End of discusion."

"Alright, well can I see the mystery guy?"

"H-" She was interupted by a loud bang and shouting. A frown found it's way to her face. "And I think he just hurt himself. Let me go help him."

Before Chad could protest, the girl was up the stairs making her way to the bathroom door. She gave a loud knock.

"Vaati what the hell is going on in there?"

"I tried shutting this damn thing off."

"Are you covered in the towel?"

"Yes."

"Then I'm coming in." Claire opened the door and walked passed the Wind Mage, she bent down and shut the water off. "My friend, Chad's downstairs alright? He brought you some clothes so don't cause a big scene. If you even THINK of making fun of the clothes he brought you, I will figure out some way to torture you."

"Very well then, I shall not make fun of the clothing."

"Good." A frown once again found it's way to her face. "He wants to meet you and that might mean some weird stuff goes on, alright?"

"Stuff?"

A nervous laugh, "You'll see. I'll be right back with a pair of clothes, you'll have to wear my slippers for now since it seems that we have the closet foot-size. Don't worry they're gray." With that she left the room and in a matter of just minutes, she was back upstairs with the pair of clothing and gray slippers.

He frowned at the clothes, "I'v-"

"Uh-uh. Remember, torture."

"If you dare pour syrup on me again I'll torture you right on back."

"You don't know anything about me, I know a bit about you. Therefore I have the upper hand." She left the bathroom to let him change and walked down stairs.

"So C one month until school starts, eh?" Chad asked as he sat down in a chair.

"Yeah one month."

"Hey you're playing Minish Cap? How far did you get?"

"Not too far...can you shut that off?"

"Did you save."

Footsteps sounded, "Shut it off!"

"Don't you want to save?"

"CHAD SHUT IT OFF!" She lept at the Gameboy and managed to click the button. The screen went to black and she let out a relieved sigh.

"Hey why'd you do th-" His words stopped when the Wind Mage entered the living room, a scowl on his lips.

"This is your friend, I presume?" Vaati asked as he looked at him.

"Chad this is V-"

"YOU'RE FRIGGIN VAATI!" Chad shouted. "C ARE YOU NUTS? YOU HAVE THE MOST BADASS VILLIAN IN YOUR HOUSE AND HE'S WEARING MY CLOTHES!"

"No duh. I blame my dumbass parents." She frowned.

"How does he know about me also?"

"You didn't tell him? Do you have a death wish?"

"Look I want to stay alive and if he DOES get his powers back then I want to be somewhat on his goodside."

"He lost his powers?"

"Would you two morons explain this to me?" Vaati growled.

"Umm studying?" Claire tried.

"Girl, I know you are not telling me something."

"You my friend are from a vid-" She clapped her hand other Chad's mouth. "Come on Chad, why don't I show you the way out?" She pulled him over to the door, flung it open, and pushed him outside. "Don't you tell ANYONE about this!" With that the door was slammed in his face.

She turned back to Vaati with an innocent smile. "He's a bit crazy."

"What are you hiding, girl?"

"Look you wouldn't want to hear it, alright? If you'd excuse me, I'll be in my room." She picked up the Gameboy and walked away.

The more she knew about Vaati, the better.

* * *

A/N: (Sighs) Chad....

* * *


	5. A Soft Embrace of Darkness

Disclaimer: Xander and Crims do not belong to me. They belong to CrimsonDarkness003-did I get the numbers right? I always forget-so stop bugging me! I own nothing but Chad, Claire and the girl who called Claire up-who is SO not really in this story and I forgot her name-the rest is owned by Nintendo. Damn Nintendo.

A/N Alright you Vaati loving fiends. ^_^ I updated. ANYWAY if you love Vaati and/or Link-SQUEE LINK-then I suggest reading fleets stories. Seriously, this girl has MASSIVE talent! I read all of her stories and was friggin amazed. She's wonderful. Read EVERYTHING she's wrote! It all has to do with Vaati and LOZ. BUT READ IT FROM THE BEGINNING AND UP!

* * *

Title: I'd Rather Die

Chapter preview: YOU BASTARD I'VE BEEN IN THERE FOR HOURS!

Chapter 5 A Soft Embrace of Darkness

* * *

"Why do we villians always lose?" Vaati frowned.

"Because they never decide to kill the hero before they start their awesome quest to destroy the world." Crims shrugged.

Xander cuddled up with a stuffed animal.

Claire suddenly gasped.

"What's the matter?" Crims asked.

Claire looked at Vaati and back at the gameboy. Repeat. "Um...er..."

"OH you're at THAT scene." Xander leaned over to see.

"Don't you two have somewhere to go?" She glared.

"Fuck you're right! Xander and I have a commerical audition for cheese in a can!" The other female jumped up and ran to the front door. "COME ON WE'RE LATE!"

Xander followed after her and took the stuffed animal with joy. "COME ON FLUFFY, TIME TO FIGHT FOR JUSTICE AND CHEESE!"

What had transpired in less then three minutes left the two remaining figures in complete confusion.

"I-I'm going to see if you have any books in Minish..." Vaati stood up and left the room.

When he was gone Claire sighed heavily and glanced at her gameboy, a sad look on her face. "What did the world do to you, Vaati?"

Speaking of the Minish...his voice rang out through the house. "Girl, there's something over here you should see!"

She stood up and followed the voice to the lounge again where Vaati stood looking in the closet that held the coats.

"What's wrong?" She asked while peaking in.

"Nothing now." He smirked and pushed her in.

"HEY WHAT'S THE BIG IDEA?!"

The door was slammed shut before she could react, leaving her in the darkness. The lock sounded followed by dark chuckling. She began to pound on the door as the footsteps left.

With a frown on her face she looked down at her gameboy that was still in her hands, a soft blue light illuminated from the handheld. "At least I still have you."

The handheld suddenly died due to little power.

"SON OF A BI-"

* * *

Vaati smiled sweetly as he unlocked the door, revealing a flustered and very pissed Claire.

Her hair was a mess and her face was red from the screaming she had done earlier, not to mention the heat.

She glared, "YOU BASTARD I'VE BEEN IN THERE FOR HOURS!"

He rolled his eyes, "I must have forgotten."

"What time is it?" Claire stepped out.

"According to the clock on the wall it is noon."

"You left me in there for three hours?"

"You slipped my mind."

"What were you DOING for three hours?"

"Looking for reading materials and watching the thing you called television inorder to brush up on what you people do."

"That's rather smart of you."

"Yes well we don't all have the I.Q of a Re-Dead."

"Re-Dead?"

"You humans are very slow."

"THAT'S IT, I'M GETTING THE SYRUP!"

* * *

A/N Yes this has a plot, yes I may do a sequal, no you may not kiss Link-he's mine bitches-, yes you may submit a character, yes Chad will be involved soon, and yes asses will be kicked by Vaati later.

* * *


	6. Another Friend

Disclaimer: Xander and Crims belong to CrimsonDarkness003. WereVampGirl owns Rhianna. And I own VAATI!

Vaati: No you don't.

Me: DAMN!

A/N: ....FOR CHEESE AND JUSTICE!

* * *

Title: I'd Rather Die

Chapter 6. Another Friend

Chapter preview: Must everyone know about him?

* * *

The phone rang at two o'clock. Sighing Claire stood up and grabbed it. "Yes?"

"Hi, I wanted to know if you wanted to catch a bite to eat or something?" A female's voice asked.

"Rhi, I'm sorta in the middle of something."

Boy was she in the middle of something! At the current moment Claire was trying to explain to Vaati that they didn't have any books in Minish.

"But I wanted to get ice cream and fudge with you. FUDGE!" Rhianna shouted.

"Jesus, calm down." Under her breath she muttered, "God why do I hang out with these type of people?"

"Fine. I'm coming over then and we'll make our own sundays."

"No I ha-"

"Someone over. Yeah Chad told me you had a guy over."

"Oh...."

"See you in a minute."

"A m-"

The doorbell rang.

Claire walked over to it and frowned when she saw Rhianna waving. "What the hell are you doing here?"

"I was already here!" She smirked, "I was planning to break an enterance if you didn't answer the phone."

"You're insane."

"It's a talent I've always possesed."

"Do you have ANYTHING I could entertain myself with?" A moan sounded.

"I have syrup that I could pour on you." She smirked.

"I swear girl, you will get it one day."

"Oh joy."

"Who's that?" Rhianna peeked.

"That's umm F-"

"Vaati." She cut her off. "Yeah I didn't want to tell you but Chad told me that part too."

"Must everyone know about him?"

"So how are you going to get him out of here?"

"Like I know." She rolled her eyes.

"Why don't you play a boardgame with him?"

"I hate his guts."

"Oh gee that's nice."

"Yes it is."

* * *

A/N Just an introduction chapter.

Meet Xander, he's the life of the party who never fails to make you laugh. "COME ON FLUFFY, TIME TO FIGHT FOR JUSTICE AND CHEESE!"

Meet Crims, she's the planner of the group. "COME ON WE'RE LATE!"

Meet Claire, she's the girl who's always dreamed of heroes and gains a villian her household. "I just guess the gods really hate my guts."

Meet Chad, he's the comforting friend who just wants to be more. "C ARE YOU NUTS?"

And meet Rhi, she's the friend who you can always count on. "Yeah I didn't want to tell you but Chad told me that part too."

Together can these loyal friends return Vaati to Hyrule? Or is he stuck there forever?

* * *


	7. Therapy Meet Vaati

Disclaimer: See previous disclaimers.

A/N Wow I'm a bit confused on what to do...

Chapter preview: When did you become a therapist?

Chapter 7. Therapy Meet Vaati

* * *

"Screw this, I'm going outside." Vaati's voice grumbled as footsteps sounded nearby.

"Oh no you're not, Wind Boy." Claire stopped him.

"He looks emo." Rhi shrugged.

"You can't stop me, girl."

"Oh yes I can! People will get suspicious about your eyes."

"You could just say they're contacts." The friend continued to suggest.

"Fine but he can't go outside!"

"Why the hell not?"

"Because you are a bad guy. Without your powers your big fat mouth could get you beat up and then I'd have to take care of you."

"I am going outside and you can't stop me."

"You two need therapy." Rhi sat down on the couch.

"I do not!" The two shouted.

"That's it, therapy session now."

"When did you become a therapist?" Claire scoffed.

"When I started dealing with everyone's crap. Now get seated and we're going to go through simple questions."

"Vaati sit down."

"I'd rather stand."

"I'd rather die but you don't see me complaining!"

"All you do is complain."

"Good we're getting somewhere!"

"RHI!"

"What it's true. Vaati thinks you complain and you two always do the oppisote-or at least from what I see."

Sure enough Claire was sitting down and Vaati was standing up.

"What's Vaati's problem, Claire?"

"Besides that he's an ill tempered, impatient, power crazed, insane, prick?"

"That'll do right there."

"Well at least I'm not a worry wart, moronic, bad looking, coward, bitch!"

"Oof that's gotta hurt!"

"YOU'RE A HEARTLESS!"

"HAG!"

"BASTARD!"

"SHUT UP YOU TWO! Jesus, you're both giving me a headache. You two are so damn alike."

"Are not!"

"See you both deny it too." Rhi rolled her eyes. "You guys seriously need therapy."

* * *

A/N You know I'm shocked nobody has written an LoZ/Heroes crossover? Sylar, Vaati, Tracy, and Veran would be a good team. Although Sylar and Vaati would SO not get along because they both want respect and power. (Sighs) Those two would be bickering. ANYWAY when this is done I'm hoping to write up a fanfic about Dark and Link! ^_^ Here's the summary that's been playing through my head.

Summary: On a quest to find another way to the Twilight Realm, Link discovers a mysterious mirror that may or may not be a good sign. When he uses it to try to get to the Twilight Realm and instead discovers his darkside will he accept him as a friend or enemy? Conspiracies, betrayl, mirrors, and romance are thrown into a high time adventure with Dark Link and Link! It just seems the hero can't stay away from trouble. The Legend of Zelda: Mirrors of Lies

Goddesses I'm so phsyced now!

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	8. Camping Trip Plans

Disclaimer: I own NOTHING except Claire and Chad.

A/N: Thought I should update.

* * *

Chapter preview: You want HIM to come along?! ARE YOU INSANE?

Chapter 8 Camping Trip Plans

* * *

Vaati had gone to the guest room to examine it a bit futhur while the two girls caught up. That us...until the cellphone rang.

"Who is it?" Ria asked.

Claire looked at the phone with a frown, "Chad."

"Pick it up!"

"Alright, jesus you are so damn bossy!" The phone was flipped open, "Claire speaking."

"C is Ria there?"

"Yes."

"Xander and Crims?"

"No."

"I was hoping I wouldn't have to call them..."

"What's the matter?"

"Josh cancled."

"For...?"

"The camping trip! Remember? Next week."

"Sorry to say but I have to cancel too."

"WHAT? YOU CAN'T! IF YOU CANCEL THEN WE'LL LOSE OUR ROOM AND WON'T GET TO GO! WHY WOULD YOU CANCEL?!"

"Jesus, not so loud!"

"Why do you have to cancel?"

"I have a power crazed villian in my house and you're asking WHY I'm canceling?"

"Damn, I was hoping that it was just a concidence Ria was there and that I dreamt that."

"Nope."

"But everyone else is booked, we're screwed."

"I'm really sorry."

"Hey I got an idea, why don't you bring Vaati with you next week instead of canceling?" Ria interrupted.

"Did Ria JUST suggest having a villian come with us?" Chad asked over the phone.

"Yes she did."

"Please put her on."

Claire handed the phone over as Rai held it away from her ear.

"ARE YOU A RETARD, RAI? HE'D FIND SOMEWAY TO KILL US! HE IS FRIGGIN EVIL AND YOU WANT TO INVITE HIM?"

"Oh please, what was the worst he did Claire?"

"He pushed me into the closet and left me there for about three hours."

"The worst he did was push Claire into the closet and let her there for three hours."

"Hand the phone back."

"He wants to talk to you."

Claire grabbed the cellphone. "What?"

"Are you alright? He didn't try rape did he?"

"As evil as he is, no. Actually I find him quite pathetic without his powers."

"We have to get him back before he hurts you."

"And the camping trip? I feel really bad about that, I can try to find som-"

"You can bring him."

"B-"

"I gotta call Xander and Crims to ask if they're still coming."

"Bu-"

"Bye!"

The phone was hung up and Claire turned to Rai.

"You want HIM to come along?! ARE YOU INSANE?"

"Look just ask him to come. Or better yet, force him. Show him you can still have fun and that you're not his babysitter."

"When's the camping trip?"

"Next week."

"Oh god, please smite me."

"Who is to say that you won't get him back before then, anyway?"

"True..."

"So no worries. If you work hard enough then maybe you'll get him out of here."

"Perhaps."

"Well I gotta go. It's getting late." Ria stood up and left while Claire stood next to the open door that surprisingly held out a cold night.

"Mom and D-" Two cars pulled in, "Never mind."

The parents ran out of the cars and hugged their daughter tightly.

"You two left me with a bad guy." She glared.

"We couldn't take off." Her mother protested.

"And the family would be mighty suspicious if we told them to babysit you. They haven't done that for years, besides if they saw him then they would have had questions." Her father stated.

"Did you eat dinner?"

"No."

"Where is he?"

"Upstairs, don't be surprised if he's demolishing the guest room."

The two ran upstairs to find the Wind Mage sitting on the bed with a journal and pen. He looked up.

"And here I was thinking you abandoned your daughter."

Her mother sighed. "Would you like some dinner?"

He gave a slight nod and grunt.

"We'll take that as a yes." The two left while Claire lounged in the doorway. She stared at him with mild interest.

"What are you writing?"

"Can I write in peace?"

"Not until you tell me."

"I'm trying to figure out how I got here. Now leave me alone."

"Fine but next week-if you're still her-you're coming camping with me."

"WHAT?"

She walked off whistling.

* * *

A/N Ah camping, wait till that tragedy comes. Because of course I'm not letting Vaati leave SO early.

* * *


	9. Big Claire's House

Disclaimer: I own NOTHING except Claire and Chad.

A/N: WereVampLvr is my muse. 8D

* * *

Chapter preview: Do you want your hair to catch on fire?

Chapter 9 Big Claire's House

* * *

The days went by quickly. Xander and Crims visited most often with Ria while Chad stayed with phonecalls. Vaati was either watching educational television or writing in his journal while Claire was either playing Minish Cap or searching on the computer about fictional characters coming alive. So far she had only found fanfictions.

Finally it was the morning before the camping trip and the doorbell rang. Her parents were out at work, no doubt.

Frowning, she stood up and changed. A loud bang sounded which was soon followed by curses in another language. It seemed everyday Vaati hit his head while waking up and had now cursed in his own language.

"Surprise!" Xander shouted.

"Wow you look like crap, Claire." Crims pushed her way through.

"We're all packing." Ria explained as she made her way in also.

Chad looked over her shoulder. "He's not up is he?"

"Actually he is. Not to mention is he pissed that he's been in this house a week."

"Well then he won't mind camping." Chad frowned.

"Your plan backfired." Claire rolled her eyes.

"Alright so does everyone have their bags packed?" Ria asked over the chatter as the door closed.

"What do you mean?" The owner of the house asked as she sat down.

"We're here to help you and Vaati." Xander shrugged.

As if on cue, the Wind Mage groggily walked downstairs wearing "Wii(tm)" pajamas. Thanks to Xander he had just about a small handfull of clothes to last through the week.

"Hey Va-" The hyper boy was cut off by the grumpy one.

"Bother me and your throat comes out."

"Yes sir."

"Is anyone hungry?" Claire stood up.

Vaati gave her a look that clearly stated that was why he was downstairs in the first place.

"Besides Wind Boy?" She fixed.

"Yes." Voices droaned.

She walked into the kitchen, surprised everyone followed her, as she began to make french toast.

"So we got a pair of underwear and socks." Crims and Ria took two packages out of their bags.

"I got some more shirts and pants." Xander gave a smug look. "Because I'm just awesome that way."

"And I have deodarent." Chad gave him a cocky grin.

"Oh you are such a prick." Vaati glared.

"No fighting at the table." Claire ordered.

"Yes, _mother_."

"Shut up, Wind Boy."

"Make me."

"Rai can you take care of this french toast really quick?"

"Sure...?"

"Thanks." Claire walked over to Vaati and wacked him on the ear.

"Ow!"

She walked back over to the stove and took back the pan.

"So you just came over here to make sure Vaati has clothes for tomorrow?"

"Nope." Crims sat back in her chair.

"We came here to make sure you had sleeping bags." Rai sat back down.

"Not to mention that we wanted to plan most of the trip before tomorrow, so we know what we're doing." Chad shrugged.

"I have sleeping bags." Claire set down a few plates and forks, along with napkins and glasses.

"Hey do you have cheese?" Xander walked over to fridge.

"Oh no, you are NOT having cheese and crackers when she just made us french toast." Crims reprimanded.

"Yes, Crims." He sat back down sadly.

"I'm starting to regret everything I did. If I had known hell would be this bad I would have never done it." Vaati put his head on the table.

"You're not in hell, for the last time this week!"

"So canones?"

"Oh that sounds like fun!" Xander shouted.

"Keep it down!"

"Yes sir..."

"C, how about canones?"

"Sounds cool. I'm up for it if you guys want to."

"We could have a picnic if we go canoning."

"With cheese and crackers?"

"Yes Xander, with cheese and crackers."

"Sweet!"

"Bonfire?"

"Too dangerous."

"Hunting?"

"Oh dear god, no."

"Fishing?"

"Maybe..."

"Gladiator fighting?"

"What?"

"Xander did you mess with my list?!"

"Maybe..."

"Moving on...archery?"

"I don't care what anyone says, archery all the way." Rai pumped her fist into the air.

"Too bad Vaati doesn't have his powers, otherwise he could turn into a giant eyeball and we could practice with him."

"Prick..." Vaati said in a sing-song tone.

"Mountain trail?"

"I'd like a nice walk."

"Swimming?"

"Of course."

"Witch trial? XANDER!"

"What we could put Crims up for trial!"

"FOR THE LAST TIME I DID NOT EAT FLUFFY!"

"Fluffy was such a good cat before you ate him..."

"I believe that's about it."

"Good so we've got an idea on what we'll be doing." Rai smiled as the french toast was placed in the center of the table.

Claire sat down. "So now you'll all get the fuck out of my house?"

"No, there's one more thing left." Crims eyed Vaati as he started eating.

He swallowed his food and glanced at her. "What?"

Chad smirked, "You need to get your hair cut."

"WHAT?"

"They do have a point...Do you want your hair to catch on fire?" Claire questioned.

"N-no but...you just can't do that!"

"I'm afraid we can, Va."

"Do not call me that, prick."

"We're getting you a haircut and that's final." Claire crossed her arms. "Until we can get you back home you'll need to have short hair. It's less supsicious."

"I hate you."

"Dude I feel your pain." Xander sighed sadly. "Crims made me get this haircut."

"It looks cute on you."

"Crims we both know it would have looked better in a ponytail."

"Yeah you're right..."

* * *

A/N ^-^ Next, enjoy Vaati's displeasure and torture of having to get his haircut. Oh the joy of fucking Vaati over.

Vaati: (Sniffles) Alas, I knew ye well Charzard.

He finally croaked?

Vaati: (Nods and sniffles)

(Gets in black dress and mourns Charzard for Vaati)

* * *


	10. Vaati Gets a Haircut

Disclaimer: I own NOTHING except Claire and Chad.

A/N: Go to my deviantart. I got a contest running for "I'd Rather Die." OMWM, I JUST REALIZED I SKIPPED A CHAPTER BY ACCIDENT! Nothing much happened in the chapter before "A Soft Embrace of Darkness" to be quite honest. All it was, was Xander and Crims meeting Vaati-not much shock-, desciptions, and Claire putting Stardust on for them. I'll add the descriptions at a later date. I'll probably go back and write that chapter at a later date. I apologize, as I had not meant to do that. Actually it looks like that chapter MAY have been taken down-is that possible-and I got the chapter number wrong...iono. I'm sorry though. Anyway youtube is very helpful.

.com/watch?v=wkXYAmMP4xU This here is a collection of HYPER SONGS. Woke me up AND got some song ideas for Xander in later chapters. Llama ^_^ I've sang #1, #2, and #4 with my BFF, not to mention #5! WAFFELS! ANYWAY any lyrics are not by me. I highly doubt a radio station is going to play any of the songs in that vid but I'm sure they'd play the song used for Xander. ;)

Chapter preview: Oh hell no. You just had an overdose of Cartoon Heroes.

Chapter 10. Vaati Gets a Haircut

* * *

The group had dragged Vaati out of the house and into a Chad's 1991 black Thunderbird. Claire buckled him in as Crims and Rai held him down and Xander grabbed Claire's purse.

"I'll get you for this, you just can't cut my hair! It's a symbol of who I am and what I believe in! THIS IS MUTINY!"

"Oh stop being such a drama queen." Crims rolled her eyes as she sat slammed the door. "I'll stay here incase your parents come home early, Claire."

"Thanks." Claire sat down in the back as she began buckling herself.

"Let me go!" Vaati shouted.

"Hey C, why don't you sit up front with me." Chad asked.

"No thanks, I like the back." Claire frowned.

Rai sat down on Vaati's right. "Relax, it's just a haircut."

"Got it!"

"Thanks Xander."

"Oh yay I call shotgun!"

"That's all that's left."

"That's because I called shotgun."

"Oh god." Chad banged his head on the horn thus making Vaati jump.

"What the hell was that?"

"The horn. It's called a car, it seems to get people pissed." Ria shrugged.

"Alright then, everyone buckled?"

"Yes Chad."

"I'll make it worth your wild if you let me go." Vaati tried coaxing Claire.

"Jesus, he's resorted to begging!" Claire laughed.

"Is getting a haircut that bad?"

"Yes it is."

"Don't worry Vaati, you can hug Fluffy!"

"I don't want a haircut!"

* * *

"Big trouble losing control. Primary resistance at a critical low! On the double gotta get a hold. Point of no return one second to go!" Claire sang off-key to the radio.

"Somebody please hit me." Vaati pleaded.

"Why?" Rai asked.

"I need to be unconcious before she starts the next verse."

"No response on any level! Red-alert this vessel's under seige. Total overload all systems down they've got control. There's no way out! We are surrounded. Give in, give in and relish every minute of it!"

"To late."

"Shut up Wind Boy!"

"I'm changing the station." Xander shrugged. A different song filled the car. "Oh yay!"

And cue off-key singing. "Here comes Spiderman! Arachnophobian. Welcome to the toon town party. Here comes Superman from never-neverland!"

Claire shrugged and began singing along as Vaati banged his head against his seat.

"Hey don't dent my seats!" Chad shouted from the front of the wheel.

When the song ended Xander turned to Rai. "Does that mean Vaati would be in a song called 'Cartoon Villian's'?"

"I guess...."

"That was Cartoon Heroes by Aqua to kick off our hyper Friday marathon! These songs are sure to make you want to get up and dance! Next up is...Move Your Feet by Junior Senior!" The radio host announced. The song began along with Vaati's banging again.

"Vaati does not like funk." Chad smirked.

"You people call this music?" Vaati asked over the noise.

"I find this song VERY catchy." Claire smiled.

"Switch to something angsty." Rai ordered. "Otherwise he might just go unconcious."

A song that would scar Claire forever started playing when Xander switched the radio station.

"Oh no not this song." Xander frowned in distaste.

"Dear god, take it off!" Rai shouted.

Claire was choking on her laughter, "Jessica made me watch something with this and the guy was drunk. He tried commiting suicide and it was hillarious."

"How could this happen to me? I made my mistakes-" The singer was cut off by Chad changing the station.

"Let's resort to finding something we can ALL enjoy."

"Nicely said Rai."

The station was changed from some punk song-which had been what Chad had changed it to-to a different station.

"And that was Hell Song by Sum 41. Next up is Animal I've Become by Three Days Grace."

Claire frowned at the fact one of her favorite songs had just went off as Rai sighed in relieve that something she didn't mind came on. Xander pouted as he leaned back in his chair. Vaati had ceased his banging and smirked slightly.

"This is much better."

"Did you say something?"

"I said that this is much better, girl."

"Oh, I like this song too. It's cool."

"I like Skillet." Rai piped up.

"Too bad they're a christan band."

"At least it's less about god and more about love."

"True."

"I like Smile!"

"Of course you do Xander, most of their songs are super hyper."

"I want coffee."

"Oh hell no. You just had an overdose of Cartoon Heroes."

"Ever have just one of those days where you feel like a monster? Next up is Skillet's Monster."

"Oh my god, that is so ironic. I love this song!" Rai sang-along.

The rest of the ride had become quite smooth with Vaati actually enjoying the music and Xander leaping into a conversation with Chad about how them having a witch trial could be quite fun.

* * *

"YOU HAVE TO GET OUT OF THE CAR!" Claire shrieked.

"You can't make me get a haircut!"

"XANDER!"

"I'm a cartoon hero."

"XANDER HELP ME THE FRIG OUT!"

Xander and Claire tugged on Vaati as they tried to drag him out of the car, where he gripped onto one of the seats.

"I may not have my magic but I'm still strong enough to not get a ha-DAMN IT!" His grip was lost and he was dragged out.

The group smirked at him. "Shall we proceed?"

With a grumble he was dragged off into the mall wearing a very fitting black T-shirt with white writing that read, "Power corrupts. Absolute power is kinda neat."

Claire pushed the doors open and grinned at the sight of the salon. "Alright guys, dump him in."

"Please don't do this, you've got me begging!" Vaati struggled.

"Aw I almost feel bad for him." Rai frowned.

"Don't worry, buddy. I brought Fluffy for you."

The girl at the counter chuckled at the sight of the dragged Vaati. "Your friend doesn't want a haircut, I presume?"

"He's a wimp." Chad spoke up.

"I hate your guts!"

"Chad don't make fun of him." Claire ordered.

"How short do you want it?"

"Um, make it short enough that he can still do that bang thing and...hmm...not get caught on fire?"

"Neck it is."

The group sat Vaati down into a chair and held him down.

"Vaati if you stop now, I'll get you something here."

"Not gonna work, girl!"

"I'll stop calling you Wind Boy."

"Tempting."

"I'll let you outside."

"Perhaps..."

"I'll umm...hmmm...I'll...well damn."

"Run out of bribes already?"

"Yes."

"You are quite pathetic."

"AHA I got it! I will teach you to read English!"

"Hmm..."

"Then you could read all the books you want."

"Deal."

The group released him and sat down in the waiting chairs.

Xander stood up, "I'm gonna hit the food court and look for cheese and crackers!" He darted off before anyone could protest.

Chad stood up, "I'll go get him." He sighed exasperated.

"Is it alright if I go pickup a couple of CDs?"

"Go ahead Rai."

"Thanks."

It was down to one.

Claire sighed and flipped through the haircut books.

"This is an odd color you got here, young man. What's it called?"

Vaati frowned and thought up an excuse. After a couple of minutes the woman thought he had ignored her and jumped when he spoke up. "Sky Lavender."

"I'll have to pick that up after work. I don't think we have a Sky Lavender here."

The teen-aged girl smirked at his creativity. "You should dye it all black, Wind Boy."

"Ah but that is far too common for me. I prefer to stick out."

"Of course you do."

After fifteen wonderful minutes of silence the haircut was over with and Vaati frowned at the mirror.

"I miss my hair."

"It's still there, Vaati. Just shorter." Claire pointed out.

"I still miss my hair."

"God you're such a cry baby. I think you look nice."

"That is what Crims said to Xander."

"You actually paid attention to that?"

"Believe it or not I do find you people ammusing."

"That'll be fifteen bucks."

"Here you are."

"Thank you, Miss. And might I add, you got quite a catch. I haven't seen a young man that handsome in a long time. Not to mention he's very creative, red contacts with lavender hair? Who knew it could be pulled off?"

Claire blushed, "He's not my boyfriend..."

"Oh? I'd ask him out if I were you, he won't be on the market too long."

Her blush deepened. "He's not really my type."

"Would you just pay already? I want to get out of here!"

"Now that you mention it...he is a bit rude."

"Glad you see it my way. Thanks!" She ran off and pulled Vaati into the food court.

Surprisingly Xander was being chased by Chad and a Security Guard. "YOU HEAR THAT STEVE? YOU'LL NEVER TAKE FLUFFY AND ME DOWN, MWAHAHAHAAH OH HOLY SHIT THAT HURTS MY THROAT!" He coughed.

"What the hell is going on here?" Vaati asked.

"Oh no, it's happening all over again! XANDER PUT THE CHEESE BACK AND APOLOGIZE TO THE WOMAN THIS INSTANT!" She ran towards him.

"Aww but Claire!"

"NO BUTS!"

"Fine. I'm sorry for calling you a lactose intolerant bitch and stealing the cheese you refused to give me." He handed it back.

"Next time, you're going to court."

"Yes ma'am."

"Vaati would you like to follow me to Barnes and Nobles while Chad and Xander go get Ria?" Claire glared at the two.

"I may not know what that is but it sounds alot better then going with prick and hyper."

She lead him away and explained that it was a bookstore. "I just have to get something so I can teach you to read. So just wander around aimlessly as if you have nothing better to do. Which you don't."

Before he could speak, she went off into the kids area and grabbed a few ABC/easy readers books. She walked over to the graphic novels to see if she could find anything that would catch his interest. Her eyes widened at the title of one of the graphic novels.

"The Legend of Zelda: Minish Cap...that'd be alot quicker then beating the game."

"Miss are you looking for something?"

She shrieked at the sudden voice and turned around. "Oh, um sorry. Thought you were somebody else. No thanks, I'm fine. Can you just ring these up for me?"

"Sure."

"Thanks."

Claire paid for the books and looked for Vaati, finding him over by the crime section. "Of course. What are you doing?"

"I saw a picture of blood and it caught my interest."

"How come I am not surprised?"

"Because apparently to you, all of us villians are just terrible rotten people who want to destroy the world."

"Well you are!"

"Did you ever stop to think that perhaps we just want some respect because nobody gave it to us? Perhaps we wanted to show the world we are more then just a lazy boy. What about the few who want to actually help the kingdom but cannot do that without a few lives lost? You people _think_ you're the heroes but you're not. You are the villians."

Her jaw dropped. "I'm sorry."

"Apologies can't change the past." He walked past her. "Now just get me out of here."

* * *

A/N O.O I thought I was going to end this with a happy little note, ya know. That this chapter would be all jokes and nothing really serious. Then Vaati leapt into that speech about villians and heroes and well...he just turned it into a partly serious chapter. Damn Vaati, why do you have to write for yourself?! The suicide thing is from Four Swords Adventure-and yes, Claire is not a huge LoZ fan. She just plays the games because her friends force her to and she enjoys them.-and Jessica is Soul. ^-^

The Sky Lavender is from a fanfic in which Vaati and Ganondorf team up. Ganondorf makes fun of Vaati about his hair and says he looks gay. Vaati says that he calls the color "Sky Lavender" and Ganondorf accuses that him naming colors makes him gay. ^_^ Of course our Wing Mage doesn't take that sitting down. Later he gets back at him at a dinner with Koume and Kotake when they ask if Ganondorf's sure he's not his lover. Vaati puts on his "best Gay voice" and when Ganondorf denies it, he starts asking why he always denies it and pretends they're not madly in love. ;) That's our Vaati! (Cue cheesy sitcom music)

CD-I Link: Great!

* * *


	11. Midnight Packness

Disclaimer: I own NOTHING except Claire and Chad.

A/N: (Listening to Brand New Eyes on youtube) ^_^ I'm a happy camper. I'm about to go play Link's Crossbow Training and pawn my family. Then I'm gonna order my books and finish this chapter. Unless it's a short chapter...

Chapter preview: Don't give me that look! It scares me...

Chapter 11 Midnight Packness

* * *

Vaati and Claire sat at the kitchen table after their mall trip. Her parents had called earlier saying that they'd be home late due to some problem at work and the two had resorted to making a quick dinner.

Of course Vaati being a bit of a klutz, Claire had taken over the entire dinner. Vaati poked at his Ravioli with his fork as if it were a living creature being disected.

"Are you going to eat or not?"

"It looks disgusting."

"God you are such a picky eater."

"Well your food always look like a deceased Moblin cooked it."

"One of my friends said that they cook roast pork."

"Roast boars, that is disgusting."

"I love roast pork."

He rolled his eyes and finally took a bite out of a Ravioli. For a split second his face lit up with surprise before he replaced it with his usual scowl.

"And you like it. Figured..."

"Do we have to go tomorrow? Isn't it enough that you ruined my hair?"

"Nope. You still have to go."

"I suppose I shall find a way to entertain myself."

"It'll be more familiar, not much has changed in wildlife."

"Very well, perhaps this will work out."

"The group packed for you so you better be nice tomorrow. And don't be so damn grumpy tomorrow."

"I'm not a morning person."

"Well try to act civilized."

She stood up and began dumping the remains of her plate into a red plastic bowl and brought it outside.

"What was that all about?"

"Oh, well when my parents aren't around I like to leave my leftovers to the cats and dogs."

"Flea bags, you mean."

Claire rolled her eyes as she put the dinner in plastic, she loaded the dishwasher and put Vaati's plate in. "Well I'm going to go pack."

"I shall be in my room."

"Any luck so far?"

"None at all."

"Hmm..."

The two went their seperate ways as two cars pulled up in the driveway.

* * *

"Urgh get in, damn it!" A frustrated voice echoed through the hallway.

Vaati leaned on the doorframe with a smirk, "Having trouble?"

"I can't close this and it's pissing me off!"

"You've been shouting about this for the past hour?"

"Yes."

He uncrossed his arms and walked over to the suitcase that she was struggling with.

"You packed too much."

"But I need all of this!"

"And what might, 'all of this', be?"

"Clothes, my swimsuit, flip flops-don't ask-, a battery lantern, a few books, a couple of CDs, a radio, a laptop, a cellphone, and my art supplies."

"How did you fit a radio in there? And what the bloody hell is a laptop?"

"Something that I've been using to search a way on getting you home. I guess I didn't fit the radio..."

"Well I'm sure your beloved Chad could carry the radio tomorrow."

"He is not my beloved!"

"Embarrassed?"

"I don't love Chad! Why does everyone have this impression we'd make a cute couple? I just like him as a friend."

He raised an eyebrow, "Eh?"

"Never mind. Look, I can't believe I'm asking this but, can you help me?"

Vaati looked at the clock and sighed, "I have nothing else to record."

"So that's a yes?"

"I could get sleep afterwards then and not be kept up by your racket."

"Are you doing pros and cons aloud? You're supposed to do that in your head."

"Fine I'll help."

"..."

"What?"

"You amaze me sometimes."

The two worked diligently, taking out each item at a time. It seemed that Claire was just one of those girls who needed everything she had with her. Eventually the Wind Mage had to trick her into thinking it was useless. By the end the laptop, fifteen books, and two pairs of sneakers were left out. They just barely managed to close the suitcase.

"Thanks."

"Now I don't have to listen to you all night."

"Is that your way of saying 'you're welcome'?"

He smirked a bit sinisterly and chuckled.

"Don't give me that look!" She gulped and backed away a bit. "It scares me..."

"Ah so I do scare you, still? And here I was thinking I lost my charm."

"Hey um, Vaati...what if we can't get you back?"

"Nonsense, I shall see to it that you do."

"I won't bother asking."

"Good."

He turned to leave when she caught him by the shoulder, a sign for him to stop.

"Uh...goodnight."

Vaati looked around the room and peeked behind her shoulder to make sure nothing was out of place. "Yes um...have a goodnight also."

* * *

A/N I didn't put is a humor/romantic for nothing you know. Now don't worry, their bickering isn't done with JUST yet. They still got ALOT of bickering to go!

* * *


	12. 3 Hours of Hell

* * *

Disclaimer: Alas all I own is Chad and Claire. Chad's a jackass and Claire's just a very normal down to Earth Girl. -_-' I'm so disappointed.

A/N Alrighty, told ya I'd update.

Chapter preview: FOR THE LAST TIME, WE ARE NOT THERE YET!

Chapter 12. 3 Hours of Hell

* * *

Claire stepped out of the bathroom dressed in a red checkered blouse, black bellbottoms, slick brown boots, and a black cowboy hat on top of her picktails. Her shoes clicked as she walked down the stairs and into the kitchen where Vaati, Chad, Rai, Xander, Crims, and her parents sat eating cereal.

"Holy cow-"

"Girl, you are workin' that outfit!" Xander snapped his fingers.

She laughed at his joke as she sat down. "I thought I'd dress a bit country."

Crims shrugged as she almost stained her denim jacket over her black shirt and cargo jeans.

Rai rolled her eyes. "Do you always have to dress the part?"

"It's fun."

"Meh, what do I care?"

Chad blushed a bit when her gaze met his and he immediatly went back to his cereal, excusing himself from his earlier sentence.

"Glad you like my bellbottoms." Her mother smirked.

"The 70's had cool clothes."

"I remember going clubing with your mother."

"Oh no, not memories. Hey Vaati nice outfit."

The Wind Mage wore a dark purple shirt and-at the moment-black jeans that were slightly wet.

"Moron over here spilt milk on me." Vaati glared at Chad.

"Whoops."

"You meant to do it!"

"Did not!"

"Did too!"

"Did not!"

"Did t-"

"Boys!"

The two looked at Claire's parents with a look of defeat.

"No fighting."

Vaati had already faced their wrath once on Thursday when he had tried to get away with cursing at Claire for tripping him. In the end the two had been sent to their rooms after being slapped on the back of their head.

Rai stood up in her brown hiking boots-that had originally started off brown-, grey T-shirt, blue denim jeans that were not ripped in anyway, and a black thick reversable jacket that had a two headed bat. "So we'll be away for two weeks, did everyone pack something to eat?"

"Umm...what do you mean by that?" Claire asked.

"Everyone has to pack at least seven meals each."

"Sh-I er mean, wangdoodle...or something just as outrageous and doesn't quite satisfy a curse. I have to pack for Vaati and me."

"I already took care of myself. Just because I don't have my powers doesn't mean I'm completly useless."

"What'd you pack?"

"He packed some of that Ravoili you made last night, soup, cheese and crackers-"

"CHEESE AND CRACKERS?!"

"Xander what have we told you before?"

"Sorry..."

"That pound cake, marshmellows-"

"I never gave him marshmellows before."

"We suggested it."

"Oh, sorry Mom."

"No problem. What else did he pack, sweetie?"

"Pancakes and french toast."

"How are we supposed to heat all of that up?"

"Well campfires...sun...the microwave in the cabin." Chad winked.

"Oh cool we have a microwave too?" She asked as she began packing food.

"Yep."

"Sweet."

"So how long will it take to get there?"

"Three hours and fourty-eight minutes."

Xander's, Crims', Rai's, and Claire's jaws dropped.

"We better head out now." Vaati grunted as he pushed in his chair.

The group followed him as Claire gave her parents hugs.

"Be careful."

"I will."

* * *

Xander sat in his red pick-up truck with Crims as they rode off.

Chad, Claire, Rai, and Vaati sat in the Thunderbird.

"Hey C, why don't you sit up front with me?"

"No thanks..."

"Fine."

Rai sat on Vaati's right and Claire on his left as the ride started off. Five minutes passed of silence until...

"Hey why didn't you ask me?"

"Oh sorry, Rai."

"Chad put the radio on."

"Alright C."

"Dear goddesses, not again."

"I promise I won't sing."

"Good."

"And that was Hannah Montana's The Climb!"

"Change it." The two females ordered.

The station was changed.

"And that was the Jonas Brother's S.O.S."

"Change it."

"Is the whole world playing Disney crap?"

"And that was Lilly Allen's Back to the Start."

"Finally."

"Next up is Cranberries Zombie!"

Rai put her head up against the window and began to fall asleep to the soft melody as Claire did the same.

Vaati sighed and decided to get some sleep too, seeing as he had gone to bed at midnight and woken up at seven to act as civilized as possible. Long story short, he hadn't talked much so he wouldn't get a bowl filled with milk and cereal on top of his head.

* * *

Sharp pain, VERY sharp pain, woke up the Wind Mage. "What the hell is going on?"

"NO NOT THE CUCCOS, ANYTHING BUT THOSE!" Claire screamed in her sleep.

"C calm down!" Chad ordered from the front.

She continued kicking Vaati and flailing her arms.

"CUT IT OUT!"

"NO DON'T HURT ME! I DIDN'T KILL HIM, I SWEAR!"

"VAATI WAKE HER UP!"

"I'M TRYING!"

Sure enough he was trying. But it seemed every punch in the arm was useless against her nightmares.

"CLAIRE, THERE'S BARBAQUE SAUCE!" Rai suddenly shouted.

Immediatly the kicking and screaming girl quieted down and her attacks became dull pokes.

"Mmm cucco."

Vaati panted as he recovered from the sudden attack. "What just happened?"

"I told Xander not to tell her to get that game." Rai sighed exasperated.

"Are we there yet?"

"Oh no it begins."

"We're still two hours and a half away."

"I'm going back to sleep."

"Bet you ten bucks he asks me that more then once."

"You're on, Chad."

* * *

"I really did that?"

"Yes you did."

"Whoops."

"I think you kicked him in the balls too."

"Oh that had to of hurt."

"Fifteen points."

Claire laughed at Rai's joke as Vaati turned and his head rested on her shoulder by accident.

She blushed slightly but ignored it.

Instead she did the next best thing.

She pushed Vaati and managed to wake him up.

"To Stone With You!"

"Reliving the past?" Rai chuckled.

"Are we there yet?"

"DAMN IT I LOST!"

"Cough up the cash Rai!"

"What bet?" The other two questioned.

"I bet Chad ten bucks that Vaati wouldn't ask that more then once."

"Oh," Claire shrugged.

* * *

"How much longer?"

"C, please don't ask that ever again. It's another he keeps asking me."

"Well how much longer?"

"An hour and a half."

Rai bolted up suddenly from her chair. "I lost the game."

"Frig you made me lose too!" Claire whined.

"DAMN IT RAI!"

"You three are morons, you do realize this right?"

"Oh go back to sleep!"

* * *

"Are we there yet?"

"FOR THE LAST TIME, WE ARE NOT THERE YET!" Claire shouted.

Vaati gave her a smug smirk, "How about now?"

"NO!"

"Now?"

"NO!"

"Now?"

"NO!"

"N-"

"ARE WE THERE YET?"

"Yes." Chad sighed.

"FINALLY!"

* * *

A/N: Vaati's rather impatient isn't he? Look up Sierra Campsite. It's GORGEOUS. I looked it up. I'm not sure if they have cabins but they might. Anyway...four words.

Are we reviewing yet?

^_^

* * *


	13. Camp Villian

* * *

Disclaimer: Sugar nananana oh honey honey nananana you are my candy reviewers! The D.S joke is owned by the creators of a Kingdom Hearts abridged series where during the show they advertise random items. Like rocks! WHO CAN FIND ROCKS NOWADAYS? I SURE CAN'T!

A/N: -_-' Today's my bro's b-day. I was being nice but he was being an ass so I retreated to my room. So while he's playing Rockband with my Mom and his friend, I'm in here listening to Not Now But Soon. Yay

Chapter preview: Let's see, one spazz, one gamer girl, one therapist, one reg., and one villian. Yep sounds about right.

Chapter 13 Camp Villian

* * *

The red pick-up truck with Xander and Crims had been parked fifteen minutes before the black Thunderbird arrived and the two were slumped against the automobile muttering curses everynow and again.

Claire, Rai, Chad, and Vaati raised an eyebrow at them as they parked.

"What are you guys doing?" Rai questioned.

"Oh well I'm trying to kill this jer-" Crims was cut off by Xander who pumped a white item into the air.

"D.S!" He shouted triumphantly.

Had they of been cartoon characters they would have sweatdropped immensly. Unfortunatly this was real life.

"So you two are out here why?" Chad asked as he walked towards one of the cabins.

"Nobody gave us a key." Crims shrugged as she turned the D.S off and followed the group.

"Who's sleeping with who?" Claire cut in.

"Men sleep in one cabin, girls in another."

"That has been the smartest thing to come out of that hole in your face." Vaati smirked.

"Why you ba-" Chad lunged at him.

Rai and Claire pushed the two away from each other and sighed exasperated. "Can you two try not to kill each other?"

"But if I kill him here then I can just get rid of the evidence in the lake and pray that a pirhana will eat his dead corpse."

"THAT'S IT SHORTY!"

"I HAVE A PERFECTLY NORMAL HEIGHT!"

Xander looked at the three girls and sighed, "I got it..."

He walked up to the two and slammed both of their heads together.

"What the hell was that for?!" The two shouted in unison as they clutched their aching heads.

"You guys better stop because you're starting to get me pissed." His eyes flared for a second. "You wouldn't like me when I'm angry."

Crims chuckled from her spot, "Alright Bruce Wayne."

Rai and Claire stared at Xander a bit in shock but shook it off.

"Alright so why don't we just go take a walk around or something?" Rai questioned.

"I'm game." Crims and Xander laughed loudly at their pun.

Chad shook his head, "I'm exhausted from the ride up here. I'll just get some sleep."

"That means Vaati's coming." Claire stated.

"What if I don't want to go?" Vaati raised an eyebrow, challenging her.

"Vaati, if Chad's going to be alone then you're not staying unless Xander does to. I don't want my friend getting killed."

"Damn."

"Alright then, come on guys!" Rai started walking off.

"Hey what about the bags?" Crims looked at the cars.

"We'll unpack when we get back." She shrugged.

Xander smirked at Vaati and nudged him a bit. "We're going on a walk with three pretty good looking women, not many guys get this chance."

"Too bad they all have some mental issue."

"Llama!"

"And I'm the only sane one here."

"Duck!"

"Din please smite me now."

* * *

The walk up the mountain was a bit hard and had annoyed everyone to no end thanks to Xander singing the Llama Song the entire way there. But it proved to be worth it when they arrived near the top of the mountain trail and saw the entire view.

"Reminds me of my palace." Vaati whispered.

"Reminds me of my trip to New York." Rai murmured.

"Reminds me of my old house." Claire wiped a tear away.

"Reminds me of Kingdom Hearts." Crims pulled her D.S out again.

"LLAMA!"

"XANDER!" The group shouted.

* * *

The group arrived back at the cabins by noon and panted from the long walk.

"Nature...hasn't....changed....much." Vaati took in a sharp breath.

A few minutes passed until Rai asked if everyone was there.

"Let's see, one spazz, one gamer girl, one therapist, one reg., and one villian. Yep sounds about right."

"Xander make sure no dead corpses end up in that cabin, alright?" Crims ordered.

"Yes ma'am." He walked over to the pick-up and grabbed out two suitcases while Claire grabbed hers and Vaati's.

"Please don't do anything bad." She pleaded.

"What's the worse I can do." He grimaced, "I'm powerless."

"Hang in there." She patted him on the back and walked into her cabin.

* * *

A/N: ^_^

* * *


	14. Trouble in Pararice

* * *

Disclaimer: I own only Chad and Claire.

Chapter preview: For once I agree with Wind Boy, you are being a complete asshole.

Chapter 14 Trouble in Pararice

* * *

Two figures ran out of the male cabin, one with a purple cape and the other one with a fist full of anger. The male with the cape cackled and teased the other male who screamed every curse he knew.

Another male figure ran out as three females came out of another cabin.

The sun was setting out on the lake when the male with the purple cape was pushed into it. The four other figures ran after them as the other male jumped in, trying to drown the theif.

"Vaati don't kill him!" Claire shrieked.

"Jesus, calm down!" Rai ordered.

"He's a fucking bastard and deserves it!" Vaati shouted as he continued to try to drown Chad.

"Xander do something!" Crims screamed.

Xander jumped into the water and pushed the two away from each other. "I hate this. You guys are ruining our trip." He let a tear roll down his cheek.

"What happened that got you so pissed?" Claire asked as she helped drag the two out of the lake.

"That prick stole my cape!" Vaati pointed a finger at him in anger.

"Why'd you bring your cape anyway?" Crims gave a confused look.

"Well I was helping him unpack when we came across it. Apparently he stuffed in there because he felt weird without it." Xander shrugged.

"You actually told him that?" Rai's eyes widened.

Vaati looked away from the group. "I told him to leave me alone but he refused to. So I gave in."

"And then Chad woke up and stole it."

"Because he's a prick."

The group was shocked to hear Claire say, "For once I agree with Wind Boy. You're being a complete asshole."

Chad rolled his eyes. "I was having some fun."

"You were being an ass." Rai countered. "And if you keep on doing this then I'm going home. And that's AFTER smacking you."

Xander sighed sadly, it was obvious the normally happy teenager was bummed out from the fighting. "I'm going to go make us dinner."

"Hey why don't we all watch a movie in the girl's cabin?" Crims suggested.

"We have a DVD player?" Rai asked.

"I paid extra." Chad smirked. "Told you that Summer job would pay off."

"I brought a few movies so don't worry." Crims ran into the cabin.

Rai and Claire glanced at the wet boys. "You guys better go dry up."

Vaati glanced at himself in distaste. The face he made just stated he hated being wet.

Chad shrugged and walked into the cabin. He came out with a towel and sopped up his wet outfit.

Xander ran into the cabin and came back with a box of yellow rice and ran into the girl's cabin, his hyper mode returning.

The two remaining girls shrugged and walked on.

* * *

"I hope he's kidding..." A female's voice echoed in the cabin.

"That jackass." Rai shouted.

"Where is the map? Here is the map!" Xander cackled.

"It was useless though." Chad shrugged.

"How the hell is it useless? It would have gotten them home." Claire argued.

"It's like watching Chad." Vaati glared at said person. "He's just as much of a dumbass."

Crims brought in the yellow rice that Xander had made and handed a bowl to Chad. "Here you go."

"Thanks." Chad grabbed a handful and threw it at the wind mage. "Whoops."

A fight started in the cabin as the girls and Xander tried to break it up. On the television a fight broke out between the friends.

Claire decided that if they were lost in a haunted forest that they'd be screwed.

* * *

A/N: Yes The Blair Witch Project.

* * *


	15. Late Night With Claire and Vaati

* * *

Disclaimer: I own only Chad and Claire.

Preview of chapter: I just can't do it anymore, he's getting to be too much.

Chapter 15. Late Night with Claire and Vaati

* * *

It had taken about ten to fifteen minutes to get Vaati and Chad stop fighting. After that the movie had been shut off and the males left the cabin and into theirs. At the current moment it was 2:17 AM in the morning when Claire grabbed on her blue robe and her gray slippers. She sneaked outside and sat on the river bank with a sigh.

"Can't sleep?" A voice chuckled dryly behind her.

Claire turned around to face Vaati and took in another breath of air before answering. "I'm not tired."

"Of course not." He sat down.

"Insomnia, that's all."

"Mmhm. That's why you were wide awake when I first arrived." Vaati's voice dripped with sarcasim.

"Alright I just can't sleep! Happy?"

"I'm never happy."

"Could you stop playing Mr. Angst for like two minutes?"

"Only if you stop playing Miss Drama Queen."

"Fine."

"Well...?"

"Well what?"

"Why are you out here?"

"Thinking."

"About?"

"Chad."

"Ah so you are lovebirds."

"No. I just can't do it anymore, he's getting to be too much."

"Yes that explained loads."

"Chad had asked me out two weeks ago. We didn't tell anyone in the group because we didn't want to worry them that we were on rough ground with friendship."

"So the prick does have a thing for you."

"Why are you out here?"

He stiffened. "I-I just can't sleep with him in the same room."

"The truth?"

A smug smirk found its way to his lips. "Villians don't tell the truth."

"Whatever. Fine, be that way."

The two sat in silence for five minutes.

"Hey, uh, Vaati?"

"Hmm..."

"How do you like it here?"

"It is odd, I wish to go home but it is good not to have to worry about some green clothed moron trying to kill you."

"Cool..." She yawned and propped herself up against a tree. In about ten minutes she was asleep and shivering slightly.

Vaati frowned at the sight and moved her head to rest on his shoulder. "You're lucky, girl, that I feel generous enough to keep you warm."

Claire sneezed in her sleep as Vaati watched the motionless lake. In about a half an hour he'd be fully asleep.

* * *

A/N More romance, yay!

* * *


	16. A Rude Awakening

* * *

Disclaimer: I own only Chad and Claire.

Preview of chapter: What is it with everyone thinking I'm a slut who just has sex?

Chapter 16 Rude Awakening

* * *

"What if Vaati took a walk and was eatten by a bear and Claire heard him screaming and then she got eatten?!" Xander whispered in distress.

"Would you quite panicking?! I'm sure they just woke up early and are getting fire wood or something for the campfire tonight." Rai hissed.

"But you saw how grumpy Vaati gets in the morning, he'd NEVER wake up to help."

"Well Claire would! She'd wake him up anyway."

"Yeah but nobody came into the cabin this morning."

"Xander, please don't get me worried."

"Sorry Rai..." He grabbed a small Ipod and stuffed the earbuds into his ears. "I'm not wearing underwear today." He whispered.

"What was that, Xander?"

"No I'm not wearing underwear today!"

"Oh no."

"Not that ya probably care much about my underwear, still none the less I gotta say!!"

Rai laughed.

"I'm not wearing underwear today!!!!!!!" He shouted at the top of his lungs.

Rai began clapping. "Get a job!"

"Thank you, honey!"

"Shut the hell up, will you?"

"Vaati!" Xander ran towards the voice and almost tripped into the lake when he saw Vaati holding Claire half-asleep.

Rai's eyes widened. "Um...hi?"

Vaati's eyes widened when he looked at the warmth in his arms and he flinced. "Shit."

"Are you holding her?" Rai questioned.

"No comment."

"It sucks to be me." Claire murmured in her sleep.

"Wake up, girl." Vaati ordered as he shook her a bit.

"Jesus, be careful with her, Vaati!" Rai ordered.

Claire's eyes opened. "Huh? Oh hi guys. I went to take a walk and must of fell asle-why the hell are you holding me, Vaati?"

He stood up and brushed his clothes off. "You were shivering and I was in a good mode."

"You guys didn't have sex did you?" Xander raised an eyebrow.

"What is it with everyone thinking I'm a slut who just has sex?" Claire sighed sadly.

"Not going to ask why you said that..." Rai muttered.

"Where's Crims and Chad?"

"Crims woke me up telling me you were missing and then Xander showed up telling me that Vaati was missing. Crims voluntered to stay incase you two come back and Chad's still asleep."

Vaati smirked at this news. "If you'll excuse me...Xander I shall need your assistance."

"Alrighty." Xander put an arm around Vaati despite his threats. The two walked away.

Claire stood up and looked at Rai. "Why do I have the feeling he's going to fuck with Chad?"

"Because most likely that's what's going to happen."

"Figured...come on let's go get breakfast."

* * *

A/N: ^-^

* * *


	17. Strange Encounters with Multi Color Hair

* * *

Disclaimer: Fuck you if you think I'm doing another disclaimer!

A/N ...I'm not in a happy mode. Right now I need to write some humor down.

Preview: Boys, why don't they ever just shut the hell up?

Chapter 17. Strange Encounters with Multi Colored Hair

* * *

Vaati and Xander ran out of their cabin cackling as Chad gave chase.

"YOU BASTARDS, LOOK WHAT YOU GUYS DID!" The male with cheese all over his face screamed.

Claire poked her head out from the girl's cabin and rolled her eyes. "They're at it again."

Rai and Crims looked up from the pancakes they were making. "Again, Crims how many times has this been?"

"I think it's been the tenth time..."

"Chad has cheese all over his face." Claire yawned. "Boys, why don't they ever just shut the hell up?"

She returned to the stove and flipped a pancake.

* * *

"Nicely done, Xander. That should teach him to mess with me." Vaati slouched on a tree while Xander kneeled down panting.

"Thanks..."

A twig snapped and Xander looked up worriedly. "What was that?"

The Ex-Wind Mage waved his hand carelessly. "Probably just a fox."

"Oh..." Xander took a deep breath and began singing very loudly. "It was a one-eyed-one-horned-giant-flying-purple-people-eater!"

"Shut up!"

"But I like that song..."

"Din, you are a pain in the as-"

"It's okay by me, it was a long time ago. It's okay by me. It's okay by me. It's okay by me, it was a long long time ago. There there baby, it's just textbook stuff. It's in the ABC of growin' up. Now now darlin', don't lose your head. Cause none of us were angels and you know I love you, yeah!" A female's voice sang.

"IT'S THE ONE-EYED-ONE-HORNED-GIANT-FLYING-PURPLE-PEOPLE-EATER!" Xander screamed in terror.

"It's a woman, you moron."

Sure enough, a young woman poked her head from behind a bush. "Oh, hello earthlings!"

"AH IT'S AN ALIEN DISQUISED AS A WOMAN!"

"Shut the fuck up, Xander!"

"Yes sir."

She stepped out from behind the bush and walked over to the two. Her outfit consisted of a denim coat with pink buttons, a black and white stripped blouse, black leggins, and white sneakers. On top of her head sat the oddest of hats. She wore a bat hat that had wings, red eyes, and two white fangs. "I'm Elimy, my friends call me Eli." Elimy noticed their eyes gawking at her hat. "Oh and this is Bobo!"

"...Where'd you get the hat?!" Xander jumped up and down excitedly while Vaati stared at her oddest feature. Her hair.

From the roots it was a dark brown like Claire's-although he did not see this part-and then faded into a ginger blonde, dirty blonde, golden blonde, and then bubble gum pink strips.

"I got it from an amusement park." Elimy shrugged. "It covers up my hair a bit, thankfully. I just wish my Mom would dye it electric blue soon! I hate blonde. So are you two brothers, because you guys look NOTHING alike."

"If I were ever related to him, I'd probably commit suicide." Vaati stood up straight. "Come, we better get back to the cabin before they assume we're gay."

Xander wiggled his eyebrows suggestivly. "Are you sure you're not just in denial?"

Elimy pointed her finger at Vaati. "Denial."

"Shun the none believer, shunnnnnnnnnnn."

"That's it, I'm going." As he walked off he gave the two the finger.

"Boy he can be a stick in the mud." Xander frowned.

"So are you guys really gay?"

"Nope! As straight as a line."

"Aw..."

"Why?"

"I was hoping I could get some gay guy friends."

"He's not much of a friend type."

"...Hey you want to take a walk with me?"

"Sure."

* * *

A/N I promise that Elimy won't be in this much. But this is sorta a side-plot...also it's best you kept this scene remembered. It'll make a difference towards the end. Just a heads-up, Elimy will NOT be in on the whole Vaati situation. She will hardly appear in this story. Elimy has my hair. ^_^ She also has my bat hat. (Hugs bat hat) I love you Bobo! Oh and if anyone accuses me of being a gay hater then look at my profile. I think you'll find the answers THERE.

Support "I'd Rather Die", copy&paste the summary onto your profile with a link to the fanfic.

* * *


	18. A Hiking We Will Go

* * *

Disclaimer: LoZ is owned by Nintendo...therefore Vaati is owned by Nintendo-Vaati: NOBODY FUCKING OWNS ME! Me: Alas Vaati, you are owned.-and I own Claire, Elimy-what an odd name-, and Chad.

A/N: (Is listening to Imogen Heap's Just For Now) It's about a realistic Christmas. And let me tell you, ALOT of the things in this song are said during Christmas with my family over.

How did you know? **Brother**  
It's what I always wanted **Me**  
Could never have had too many of these **Grandma**  
Well you, quit kicking me under the table **Me/Mom/Grandma/Dad**  
I'm trying; will somebody make her shut up about it? **Mom**  
Can we settle down please? **Me/Uncle**

I'm hoping this is a long update. This one's for werevamp! ^_^ (Hugs her) Thanks Sissy for all the sweet comments about my story. Crims never told me if her characters were dating, therefore I made them cousins. 8D

Preview: I'm going to pretend that I didn't just step in horse shit.

Chapter 18. A Hiking We Will Go

* * *

"So Xander's with some mysterious multi colored hair girl?" Crims sniffled. "They grow up so fast!"

Rai rolled her eyes at Crims reaction. "Jesus, your cousin is old enough to take care of himself."

Claire poured more syrup on her pancakes. "So Xander's definatly not going on the hike with us then."

"Not like I'd want that traitor with me." Chad pouted.

"Dramatic prick." Vaati muttered.

Chad lunged across the table for Vaati when Rai put her fork up which poked him in the hand. "SON OF A BITCH!"

"Cut it the frig out you two." Rai glared.

The other two girls ignored the scene and stood up. "Let's go."

* * *

"I hate nature, I hate nature, I hate nature." Vaati mumbled repeatedly as they hiked.

"I'm tired." Crims complained. "I want water."

Chad tossed her a bottle. "Here."

"I want television."

"Here." He pushed her into the lake. She resurfaced and came out dripping wet.

"YOU JERK, I'M FREEZING NOW!"

"Walk it off."

Rai walked upfront with Claire talking excitedly about something.

The two girls upfront suddenly stopped.

"What's the matter, C?"

"Look at this." Claire whispered.

Crims stopped wringing her clothes out and looked up ahead. "Holy shit."

"What is it?" Vaati furrowed his eyebrows.

"Look at this field." Rai sighed. "It's gorgeous."

That it was. To the right was the mountain and to the left was a barn up on a hill. A small stream from the lake ran through the field and three Weeping Willows were scattered about. Behind them was the woods that would lead back to their cabins.

"ONE-EYED-ONE-HORNED-GIANT-FLYING-PURPLE-PEOPLE-EATER!" A voice screamed and grabbed onto Vaati's shoulders.

Vaati jumped and let out a slight yelp.

The girls eyes were a bit frantic while Chad was darting off towards the barn.

"XANDER!" Claire shrieked. "YOU NEARLY GAVE US HEARTATTACKS!"

The red haired teen laughed. "Man you guys are easy!"

"I thought you were with your girlfriend." The other male growled.

Xander blushed. "Hehehe, she's not really my girlfriend. She had to get back to her parents' cabin."

Rai looked at the small speck that was still running towards the barn. "Hey um, guys? Chad ran off. Think we should go get him?"

"I say we leave him behind and hope he doesn't find his way back."

"Vaati, that's rotten. As much as he's a jerk and pu-you know what? I say we go with Vaati's plan." Crims cut herself off.

"Guys, he paid for this trip. The least we can do is get him back." Rai sighed. "Even if he's been a jerk."

"It was a one-eyed-one-horned-giant-flying-purple-people-eater." Xander hummed.

"Xander, do us all a favor." Vaati started out sweetly. "Shut the fuck up."

* * *

"Chad?" Claire called out as they entered the barn.

"Chad, it's okay, it was only Xander." Rai chimed in.

"Perhaps he tripped and hit his head on a rock, let's go before we find the dead body."

"I agree with Vaati!"

"I don't want to see a dead body." Xander whimpered.

Claire gritted her teeth suddenly. "I'm going to pretend I didn't just step into horse shit."

Rai looked at Claire's boots and grabbed out a camera. "I am going to put this in a scrapbook." She snapped the photo.

"Hey guys look what I found!" Chad shouted from somewhere in the barn.

"Everyone, split up! Vaati and Xander go up the ladder and see if he's over there. Crims and Rai go to the right side of the barn. I'll go to the left."

They did as they were told.

"Hey do you like Claire?" Xander suddenly pipped up.

"I don't like anyone, especially women. I find a pretty woman, I have some fun, and then she's gone."

"Womanizer."

Vaati shrugged as they continued on.

"Do you like me? Like a friend, you know."

"I already said that I don't like anyone."

Xander gave him a hug. "You're not that heartless, buddy. Don't worry I understand."

--

"You think Claire likes Vaati?" Crims asked.

"To be honest, I really don't know. I mean she acts like she hates him and all but...they've been getting along lately. I hope she realizes-if she even cares for him-that he's just a jerk who doesn't give a crap."

"Meh. Anyone's better then Chad."

"Shh, he might hear you."

--

"Chad, where are you?"

"Over here! I already told you guys I found something." Chad chuckled. "I think you'll like it, C."

She spotted him in the hay holding a small kitten. "Aww it's so cute!"

"It's a boy. I just found it over here. What are you going to name it?"

Claire seemed to ponder over the name. "We can call him Greg."

Chad frowned. "Why not name it after me?"

"...Why should I name it after you?"

"Well I found it and I thought we were friends."

"That doesn't mean I have to name it after you."

"But C....I-"

"Guys I found Chad!" She interrupted on purpose.

* * *

By the time the group made it back to the cabins, the sun was setting. They had eaten a packed lunch of sandwiches under a Willow Tree and by now were famished.

"Chad where are you going?" Rai asked him as he walked back to his cabin.

"I'm going to eat by myself tonight. I'm tired." He lied and slammed the door.

The group sat outside by a campfire Xander had set up with hotdogs on sticks.

"Nature hasn't changed much." Vaati yawned. "It's still a bitch."

Claire nodded as she bit into her hotdog.

"What are in these?" Xander questioned as he took a bite. "I never really asked before."

"Lips and asses." Rai answered.

Xander shrugged. "Who knew an ass could taste so good?"

The Wind Mage did not eat his hotdog. By nightfall Crims had broke out the marshmellows and popped a roasted one into her mouth. "So any ideas on how we get him back?"

"Vaati?" Rai shrugged. "Not the faintest clue."

The red head frowned and cried a bit. "I'm gonna miss you when you leave!"

"He's still here, Xander. Don't cry." Claire hugged Xander.

"Thanks Claire."

"Have you people tried a library?"

"...We were looking stuff up on the computer." The four laughed nervously.

"When we get back I'll research furthur into it. It seems I can't rely on any of you."

"We've been working hard, Wind Boy." Claire poked his chest with each word. "So be considerate that we're not just dropping you off here and leaving!"

Rai and Xander stood up and went into their cabins, they returned with five sleeping bags.

"It's nice out tonight so let's sleep outside." Xander shrugged.

Crims, Rai, and Xander hastily got set up and put the fire out before going to sleep. Leaving the other two alone together in their sleeping bags.

"Vaati, why are you such a cold hearted bastard?"

"Glad you finally realized."

"Quit acting like we're out to get you. Tell me."

"You're only strong if you stop being so _kind _and _sweet_. It only holds you down." He yawned. "No point in it."

Claire frowned. "Fine." Her breathing slowed down and she fell asleep.

Vaati looked at the stars for about an hour before getting up and deciding to take a walk to tire himself out. He walked over to the lake and lounged up against a tree when footsteps sounded. He was a bit more alert then usual at the fact that it could have been a bear-or a wolf-looking for a late night snack of Wind Mage.

He heard a yawn.

"Can't sleep again?" Claire's voice drowsily asked.

"I thought you were asleep."

"Had a nightmare." She shrugged.

They didn't hear the footsteps crunching over the leaves.

Claire walked over to him and rested her head on his shoulder. "You know you're not as bad as I thought you were?"

"Sure I'm not." He scoffed. "I'm just a barrel full of fun."

"You keep me on my toes." She shrugged. "I don't think the group has had such fun in months. Xander's going to collage soon which has had everyone upset this entire summer. Chad's going too but he's going to a collage close by so it's not like we won't see him again. Crims may be going to bootcamp this year, her parents are pretty angry with her about slacking off in school. Rai's moving to New Jersey because her Dad got a better job down there. Me? I'm staying right here. Most likely alone. We haven't brought it up much but we're going to miss each other. We don't want to split up. You really have helped us, believe it or not."

The female moved a bit and tripped on a branch, sending her into the lake. She shrieked as she fell in and swam out. She was freezing, wet, and in shock by the sudden impact. Vaati ran to bank of the lake and helped pull her out until she passed out on the bank with him dripping wet next to her. He now heard the footsteps.

"What did you do to her!?" Chad shouted as he rushed over to her.

"She tripped." He panted and noticed the dangerous look in Chad's eyes. If he were to get extremly angry with no one around then he'd be defenseless. "I swear."

"You hurt her, you bastard!" He jumped on Vaati and began punching him.

Vaati cursed. He tried to knock Chad out but the fact was, Chad just was stronger then him.

Running was heard as Chad choked Vaati.

"What the hell are you doing!?" Xander screamed when he saw the scene.

"Stay out of this Xander!" Chad ordered.

"Chad cut it out!"

"THIS ISN'T YOUR BUISNESS, XANDER!"

"YES IT IS! NOW LET HIM THE FUCK GO!" He punched Chad in the face.

Chad lost his grip on Vaati and he dropped down next to the passed out Claire, panting. "What the hell are you doing, Xander?"

"I'm not going to let you kill, Vaati! He's my friend!" Xander shouted.

Chad kicked Xander and the fight was on. Other footsteps sounded. Rai, Crims, and Elimy's family appeared.

"Boys cut it out!" Elimy's father stepped inbetween the two bloodied teens.

Xander was missing a tooth or two and he had a cut by his right eye while Chad's nose and wrist were at an odd angle. Vaati had a few bruses and a black eye.

Crims and Elimy ran over to Xander worriedly while Rai ran over to Claire and Vaati.

"Are you alright, Vaati?" Rai asked.

"I'll be fine." He panted. "I always knew he was a bloody nutjob."

"What happened? What's wrong with Claire?"

"She tripped into the lake and passed out when she got to the bank. Chad saw me with her out cold and accused me of hurting her."

"So Xander heard the fight and came over..." She nodded in understandment.

--

"Xander are you alright?" Crims hugged him.

"I'm fine, Crims." He grinned. "Nothing can hurt me!"

"Oh Xander, thank god you're alright!" Elimy cried and gave him a kiss on the cheek.

He blushed. "Come on Eli, not infront of my cousin."

Crims laughed at the sight. "So you finally got a girlfriend?"

Elimy blushed with him. "We both like cheese and crackers..."

* * *

Claire woke up to red and blue flashing lights. She looked down at the soft bed and frowned. "How'd I get here?"

"Chad beat the shit out of Vaati because he thought he hurt you, Xander saved Vaati and beat the crap out of Chad, and then Eli's parents-Eli's Xander's girlfriend now-called the cops and broke the fight up." Rai explained across from her. "So Crims and I got you back to the cabin."

"Where's Vaati and Xander?"

"They're being interviewed by the cops." Crims answered over by the table where she sipped some tea.

"Looks like the camping trip's off..." She laughed dryly.

"Guess so." The girls shrugged.

"You think Chad'll go to jail?"

"Nah, his parents would bail him out if they did." Rai frowned. "Although he deserves it for trying to kill someone."

"He tried to kill Vaati?"

"He was choking him. I mean sure Vaati tried drowning him but we both know he wouldn't do it. Villian or not, he has some morals." Crims sighed. "Which sucks."

"Everything's packed by the way." Rai stated. "Xander and the cop will be driving us home."

"Did the cop call our parents?"

"Yeah."

"I guess camping wasn't such a good idea."

"It was fun while it lasted."

* * *

A/N Who now loves Xander?!

Who nows HATES Chad?

Who wishes Vaati could have beat the shit out of Chad?

Eli made herself useful, thankfully.

I'm unsure of this but...I think sixteen is a normal age for collage.

* * *


	19. I Think I'm Breaking Out

* * *

Disclaimer: Alas, all I own are my characters, Elimy, Claire, Chad-the jackass-, and now Greg the Kitten!

A/N: Before we begin this chapter, I'd like to ask you guys a question that I want you to answer. Who is your favorite OC in the story?

Xander, Elimy, Claire, Chad, Crims, or Rai?

Tell me in your review. ^_^ Oh and I have a treat for the reviewers when this story ends. I think you'll all like the idea.

Preview: Chad tried killing Vaati, I got a kitten, and now Vaati and Xander are pretty close. Yep this is all just normal teen stuff.

Chapter 19 I Think I'm Breaking Out

* * *

Claire yawned as she entered her house with Vaati and the small Tabby kitten named Greg.

Her parents rushed over to her instantly.

"What happened? Did you get hurt?" Her mother questioned.

"No one tried anything funny with you, right?" Her father glanced at Vaati.

Vaati rolled his eyes. "I did not take her virginity if that is what you are getting at."

"Great way to cut to the chase." Claire scoffed. "Jesus christ, how did I get the title of slut?"

"CLAIRE!"

"Mom, I'm being honest."

"What happened?"

"Chad tried killing Vaati, I got a kitten, and now Vaati and Xander are pretty close. Yep this is all just normal teen stuff." She said the last sentence with sarcasim.

Her parents looked at Vaati, then her, then the kitten, and then at each other.

"I'm getting far too old for this..." Her father muttered as he walked off.

"Great to know you guys care." Vaati murmured.

The teenaged girl began walking upstairs with her suitcase and glanced at the clock. "Three in the freakin' morning? Great, now I'll sleep all day! Come on, Greg, let's get you set up in my room..."

* * *

The sun was rising, the birds were chirping, love was in the air, and smoke was everywhere. Ahh Thursday.

"NO, MY SAUSSAGE!" Claire whined.

Vaati laid his head on the table. "You woke me up, why?"

"Because it's time for breakfast and you said you wanted to go to the library. I thought it'd be best if we go together early in the morning before anyone else goes there so you can keep a low profile."

"And what about that furball?"

"Don't talk about Greg that way! Xander said he'll come over and watch Greg for me."

Her cellphone went off. "Do you like waffles?" Xander's voice sang as she picked up.

"Yeah we like waffles!" She shouted.

"Do you like pancakes?"

"Yeah we like pancakes!"

"Do you like french toast?"

"Yeah we like french toast!"

"Do-do-do-do can't wait to get a mouthfull! WAFFLES! WAFFLES!" The two finished in unison.

"I'm going to presume that is Xander." Vaati's muffled voice spoke up.

"That would be the one and only Xander." Claire laughed. "What's up Xander?"

"_Wellllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll_-"

"Xander, get to the point."

"Okay, jeeze. Well, I can't come over because my parents want me to watch their pork cook or something just as equally crackerless and cheeseless. But you can bring Greg over here."

"Alright, I'll drop Greg off in about ten minutes."

"Oh, bring cheese and crackers while you're at it. I'm going insane. NO YOU SHUT UP, MR. WINKLETONS!"

Had Claire of been chatting with Xander online she would have made a emotioncon like so 'O.o' but since she wasn't, she said. "Yeah....bye Xander."

She turned around to tell Vaati that they'd be skipping breakfast only to find him not there. "Son of a bitch, he ran off. Vaati!"

"Bed, sleep, tired, shut the fuck up." A sleepy voice called back.

"Oh, of course you can say that just perfectly fine. Get up, we're leaving!"

Claire looked at herself in the mirror and frowned. "I think I'm breaking out."

* * *

A/N: Here's a funfact. I was listening to Way Away when I decided to write this chapter up intsead of doing math. A lyric in the song is, "I think I'm breaking out!" So I put that down as the title of the chapter and said, "Hey that could mean something completly different!" This is a BIT of a filler chapter. Something I just had to get down to state that Greg the Kitten has not be forgotten and that Vaati and Claire returned home safely. (Is listening to TP credits) :'(

ANYWAY, review, love, and DO YOU LIKE WAFFLES?!

Gimme, gimme, gimme a reviewer after midnight! Help me chase the flamers away. ^-^

Vaati: (Pulls covers overself) Sleep....

NO MORE SLEEP FOR YOU, SNORELAX, IT'S 1:13PM! YOU'RE GETTING UP AND OFF MY BED SO I CAN DO MY SCHOOL WORK ON THERE!

* * *


	20. On The Right Track

* * *

Disclaimer: Alas, all I own are my characters, Elimy, Claire, Chad-the jackass-, and Greg the Kitten!

A/N You're lucky, guys. I REALLY want to write this part of the story and in order to get there sooner I'm updating TWICE today.

Preview: It's a freakin' banana not a yogurt!

Chapter 20. On The Right Track

* * *

"Any idea on where we look first?" Claire asked when they arrived at the library kittenless.

"Historical Records?" He suggested.

"I highly doubt anything about someone crossing into another world would be in Historical Records. What about Fantasy?"

"Myths?"

"I'll take Fantasy and you take Myths."

The two split up and went their different ways.

"Looking for something, young man?" A librarin whispered to Vaati.

He furrowed his eyebrows in thought and suddenly smiled a bit sinisterly. It was time to find out how Claire and her friends knew about him. "I'm looking for a book with a character named Vaati."

"Oh, Minish Cap? A couple of third graders picked it up earlier, sorry. I can put that on hold for you."

"Never mind."

"Alright." She walked off.

He had one question on his mind, why did she know about the cap also?

--

"No eating in the library!" An old librarin hissed at Claire whom was hunched over a book.

"It's a freakin' banana not a yogurt!"

--

"We got it!" Rai jumped up.

"I'll call Claire right now." Crims stood up and pulled her cellphone out. She was a bit more than surprised when Claire's phone rang close by.

"Yellow?" Claire's voice asked nearby.

"Claire, we're like a row away from you and we found out how to send Vaati back." Rai grabbed the phone from Crims.

"You did?!" Claire's figure sprinted towards them and past. She returned in just seconds with Vaati. "What did you guys find?"

"Two things." Crims held up a book. "It's some legend thing about how-"

"Let me see that." The teenaged girl snatched the book and began reading it aloud. "Every ten years or so the door to worlds are opened by hidden desires. One person from the other world may enter and no more then that. If were one to stay for a month then they would slowly change their appearance to a human." She looked up from the book. "So if we don't get you back before the month's up you'll look like a human?"

"Keep reading! Now that you have this book I can get home." Vaati urged her to continue.

"There's a problem though." Rai interrupted. "There's about two different ways to get back and each are extremly difficult."

Claire flipped through the pages until she came to the part that stated the ways back. "One way to return is to fill the hidden desires that two connected people have. Another way is to find an object this person is most interested in and restore their power."

"Hidden desires inside both of you, I mean, they're HIDDEN. That'd take forever to find out let alone accomplish." Crims hissed.

"And finding an object Vaati's interested in? That's like ordering a cat to play as Scooby-Doo." Rai sighed sadly.

The two others looked at each other with slight amusement. "We know exactly what we need."

* * *

A/N Is this the end? OH DEAR, NOT THE END!!! ;D

* * *


	21. I Hit The Bottom

* * *

Disclaimer: Alas, all I own are my characters, Elimy, Claire, Chad-the jackass-, and Greg the Kitten!

A/N ...^_^

Preview: We're fucked. That's it, I'm going to have to live with you for the next four years of my life. I hate this!

Chapter 21 I Hit The Bottom

* * *

The four walked into Claire's house only to see Xander sitting on the couch.

"Uh, Xander, not to be rude but...why the fuck are you in my house?" Claire piped up.

"OH HI! Greg pee'd on my couch and my parents came home...hehehe, they told me to get lost with the kitten." Xander smiled hugely. "SO I used that key under your doormat."

"Greg!" She scolded the small kitten while Vaati walked upstairs.

"IT'S NOT HERE!"

"What's he on about?" Rai sat down.

"NOT THERE!?!" She ran upstairs.

The rest of the group followed after her and walked into her room where she was on the ground looking for something.

"Where could it be?"

"How should I know?" Vaati shot back.

"Look, Wind Boy, stop giving me lip!"

"You fucking lost it!"

"I lost it?! MAYBE YOU STOLE IT AND THEN LOST IT!"

"THAT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE! WHY WOULD I STEAL IT IF I KNEW IT WERE A REPLICA?"

"MAYBE YOU DIDN'T BELIEVE ME!"

"GUYS, WHAT IS GOING ON?" Crims interrupted.

"What are you two looking for?" Rai leaned in the doorway.

"You didn't lose the cheese and crackers did you?" Xander looked just about ready to cry.

"No we did not, Xander. We're looking for my necklace." Claire sighed.

"Your necklace is what got Vaati interested? Why the hell would he be interested in a unicorn necklace?" Rai gave him a bemused expression.

"...You really were in denial?" Xander asked.

"No not that necklace. The tri-force one that Xander got me for my birthday."

"Of course!" Crims laughed. "Of course he'd be interested in that!"

"My only way back and you lost it." Vaati glared at Claire.

"I did not lose it!" She shrieked.

"Claire, you're positive you didn't lose it?" Rai raised an eyebrow.

"I'm positive." She nodded.

"Then someone must of stole it!" Crims shouted in annoyance. "I bet it was that no good Chad."

"Hey, where do you think you could get off hating Chad?" Rai poked Crims. "Just a day ago he was one of our friends. I don't like him either but I'd never accuse him of stealing."

"Yes, he wouldn't steal something but he'd try to kill me." Vaati rolled his eyes.

"We're fucked. That's it, I'm going to have to live with you for the next four years of my life. I hate this!" Claire sunk to her knees.

"Don't worry guys, we'll figure something out." Xander tried to be optimistic.

"Yeah, I'm sure we can get Vaati home." The other two girls smiled despite the situation.

"Chad hasn't been upstairs ever since Vaati came here, neither have you or Rai, and...Xander has been here the entire time by himself."

"You are not accusing my cousin of stealing." Crims narrowed her eyes.

"N-no, of course not."

"I'd never steal, you guys know that." A few tears came out from Xander's eyes.

"Yeah, Claire, how could you think something like that?" Rai pouted.

"It's the only thing that makes sense!"

"I agree with her, it is the only thing that makes sense. Xander didn't want me to leave in the first place."

"You two are insane! MY COUSIN WOULD NEVER DO A THING LIKE THAT! Come on Xander, we're leaving." Crims grabbed Xander by the wrist and slammed the door behind the two.

"I can't believe you guys." Rai shook her head and left.

"Great, now my only friends hate me." Claire cried. "It's just that's the only thing that makes sense!"

* * *

A/N Did Xander really steal from Claire? Is Vaati stuck there forever? AND WHERE THE FUCK IS GREG THE KITTEN?!

^_^

Support "I'd Rather Die", copy&paste the summary on your profile.

* * *


	22. Xander and Crims

* * *

Disclaimer: Alas, all I own are my characters, Elimy, Claire-the bitch D:-, Chad, and Greg the Kitten!

A/N Do you guys hate me for the previous chapter? Aw well. To make up for the devistating cliff hanger, here's a second update. ^_^ Wow I'm on a roll.

Preview: Great, the moon's falling down, isn't it? Damn Skull Kid.

Chapter 22. Xander and Crims

* * *

Crims sat on a stool while Xander wiped down the counter infront of her.

"I can't believe that slut believes you stole from her." Crims sipped at her milkshake.

"Don't call Claire that, she's just upset." Xander pouted. "Oh and that's two bucks with cousin discount."

"Aw but Xander!"

"I said discount."

"Lousy overpriced-" Crims continued to rant as she dug through her purse.

"Yo, get me a large cheese burger, small chilli fries, and a medium Dr. Pepper." A guy walked over to the two.

"Jake, one large gooey cow, one small meaty potatoes, and a medium operator." Xander called out. "That'll be twenty dollars, buddy."

"Why the hell did you take this job up ANYWAY?" Crims asked as she gave him the cash.

"Hey, I need it for my apartment I'm saving up for."

"Xander, don't look so down with your big fat frown. Want me to go grab some cheese and crackers down at the store?"

"No, I'm fine."

"YOU DON'T WANT CHEESE AND CRACKERS?" She shouted, making fifteen people in the fast food joint look over at the two.

"Yes I don't want any."

"Great, the moon's falling down, isn't it? Damn Skull Kid."

"No the moon is not falling down, I'm just not in the mood."

"..."

"What?"

"Who are you and what have you done to my cousin?'

"Here you are, buddy." Xander handed the person the food. "Look, Crims, it's no big deal."

"Yes it is! Ever since we got back you've been...normal." She cringed at the word.

He shrugged.

"I should kill that girl for doing this to you. Hey, isn't that your girlfriend?" Crims pointed to a girl in a cap leaving the place.

"Why didn't she order anything?" Xander wondered aloud.

"Something's fishy around here..."

"Well we did add fishfillets-"

"Not that you moron!"

* * *

A/N: Why didn't Elimy talk to Xander? ^-^ All in due time my pleasent reviewers.

* * *


	23. Rai

* * *

Disclaimer: Alas, all I own are my characters, Elimy-?-, Claire, Chad, and Greg the Kitten!

A/N THANK YOU GUYS SO MUCH!!!! 50 reviews! THAT'S THE MOST I'VE EVER GOTTEN!!!!!!!!! YAY! AND THE WORST PART IS BEFORE IT GETS ANY BETTER WE'RE HEADING FOR A CLIFF!

Preview: That bitch would make a wonderful villian.

Chapter 23 Rai

* * *

Rai sat on the sidewalk licking an ice cream cone by herself thinking about the events that she had recently gotten herself into.

There was the whole Vaati incident, Chad trying to kill Vaati, and then Claire acusing Xander of stealing. Oh and the fact that she'd be moving soon.

"This is the worst summer ever." She moaned. "I don't want to move!"

She spotted a girl with a cap walk past the ice cream truck with a ice cream sandwich. Five minutes past until something dawned on her.

"SHE HAD ON CLAIRE'S NECKLACE!" Rai got up to her feet and ran down the way the girl went. "WAIT UP!"

The girl turned around and her eyes widened. She sprinted ahead.

"GET BACK HERE!" She screamed.

Cap Girl ran down an alley and made a sharp turn to the right. Rai, not expecting the turn, slammed into a few empty trash cans and fell down.

Rai groaned as she stood up and clutched her head until she realized something odd and familiar about the girl's hair. "That was Eli!" She began running to Bob's Burger Joint where Xander worked. "That bitch would make a wonderful villian."

* * *

A/N I know it's a short chapter but I'm making today a double update day. ^_^ SO, Eli's not so good after all, eh? Just what the fuck is going on?

Sad news: We're coming to the end of the story. I also won't be able to do this chapter I wanted to do. Well, I might be able to...actually I think I might get to do it after all.

* * *


	24. Awkward Moments

* * *

Disclaimer: Alas, all I own are my characters, Elimy-?-, Claire, Chad, and Greg the Kitten!

A/N JUST WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?!

Preview: Did you just shut me up with a kiss?

Chapter 24. Awkward Moments

* * *

"They all hate me now." Claire continued crying while Vaati awkwardly stood there. "And they'll spread rumors that I'm a slut! A-a-a-an-"

She was cut off by Vaati's lips crashing into hers, until they finally released.

"Did you just shut me up with a kiss?"

"You talk far too much." Vaati sighed exasperated.

"...I-I think I enjoyed that."

"It was alright."

"I'm guessing that wasn't your first kiss."

"For a slut, you haven't had much practice." He smirked.

"You're a tease."

"Why thank you."

Claire crashed her lips up against his. "Bet you didn't see that coming."

"Not in the least."

The two leaned in and kissed a third time.

"You're getting better." Vaati winked.

"Guess I catch on fast."

* * *

A/N: ^_^ Didn't say it was awkward for them. It was awkward for US! Third chapter...? Maybe...^-^"

* * *

Sad news: We're coming to the end of the story. I also won't be able to do this chapter I wanted to do. Well, I might be able to...actually I think I might get to do it after all.

* * *


	25. I'd Rather Die

* * *

Disclaimer: Alas, all I own are my characters, Elimy-?-, Claire-man oh man she is in some serious shit-, Chad, and Greg the Kitten!

A/N WHAT NEXT, DANCING LLAMAS?! XANDER, I SAID WE'RE CANCELING THE DANCING LLAMAS!

Preview: I'd rather die then be with you!

Chapter 25 I'd Rather Die

* * *

The doorbell rang, interrupting Vaati and Claire in their current activity. Which so happened to be kissing. Who would have known a villian and an average girl could hit it off so quickly?

Claire ran down the stairs, flushed, and opened the door. "Eli?"

Eli ran into the house looking like she had been sobbing for hours. "X-X-Xander dumped me!"

"Xander dumped you?" Claire shut the door. "How the hell did you know where I live?"

"HE SAID I WAS UGLY AND A BITCH!" She sobbed.

"That's not like Xander." Vaati walked down the stairs. "That boy would never say anything like that."

"He called a woman at the mall 'a lactose intalerant bitch' and you're saying he'd never say that?" Claire scoffed.

"He's not a womanizer, that boy is far too nice."

"Didn't know you held him in such high standards."

"I just keep surprising you." He sat down.

"Hello, sobbing girl over here!" Eli choked out.

"That's nice and all but how did you know I lived here?"

"He dumped me infront of his cousin at that burger place!"

"I just love how she keeps ignoring me."

"I'll be in the kitchen." Vaati stood up and under his breath spoke, "I can't stand this girl." He left the room.

"Can I get a glass of water?" Eli cried.

"Sure, right over there." Claire pointed to the kitchen.

The odd girl stood up and walked into the kitchen.

"Claire, I think your water's coming out funny." She called out.

"Is it?" Claire walked into the room and gasped.

Elimy held onto Vaati and the two were pressed up against the wall kissing.

"...WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?!"

Elimy was let go and cried harder. "H-h-he just grabbed onto me and-and-and-" She sobbed uncontroubly.

"YOU WOMANIZER!" Claire shrieked and slapped him hard across the face.

"I-I'm going home!" Elimy ran out of the house.

"I didn't do anything, that slut threw herself on me!" Vaati shouted.

"THREW HERSELF ON YOU? WHY THE HELL WOULD SHE DO THAT?!"

"BECAUSE SHE'S A SLUT!"

"JUST TWO MINUTES AGO WE WERE KISSING AND YOU CHEAT ON ME?"

"You don't really believe I kissed her, do you?" He glared.

"I'd rather die then be with you!" She stomped out of the room and into the living room.

Vaati followed. "They're right, you're insane! First you accused Xander of stealing-"

"You backed me up!"

"And now you accuse me of cheating on you-which we weren't even dating to start with."

"Oh? So kissing doesn't seal the deal?"

"I just kissed you to shut you the fuck up!"

"YOU'RE A HEARTLESS BASTARD! I WISH YOU NEVER SHOWED UP IN MY ROOM." She ran up the stairs.

A bang followed, surely the slamming of her bedroom door. Angry tears flowed from her eyes as she sat down on her bed.

"You've really done it, Claire! Falling in love with a fictional villain that doesn't even care about you? BLOODY BRILLIANT!" She yelled at herself.

Vaati sighed as he sat on the couch. "You've really done it, you just couldn't have told her that you feel a bit about her?" He asked himself. "Couldn't just let down that barrier for two seconds? Nicely done, Vaati, I applause you for your stupidity."

* * *

A/N: -_-' Those two are just tradgic. Why didn't Claire notice Elimy had on her necklace? Because, if Elimy DID steal it then she obviously would take it off first before visitng Claire.

Duh.

* * *


	26. Chad and Elimy

* * *

Disclaimer: Alas, all I own are my characters, Elimy-?-, Claire-man oh man she is in some serious shit-, Chad, and Greg the Kitten!

A/N Xander really wants those dancing llamas. Now, the plot unfolds!

Preview: That bastard is never getting back now.

Chapter 26. Chad and Elimy

* * *

Chad sat on his couch next to Elimy as he pet her hair.

"So, what did you do?" He raised an eyebrow. "You didn't skimp out on anything, did you?"

"Nope. Did just as you told me. I got that lousy piece of junk while I 'visited' Xander."

"You never did tell me how you mannaged to accomplish that."

"I stopped by Claire's-I was going to tell her some sob story-when he opened the door. He asked what I was doing there and how I knew where he was. So I told him that I called him and his parents said he was there. He believed me and I went in, told him I had to go to the bathroom, found the lousy trinket, walked back downstairs, and then told him I had to be at work. Easy as pie." She smiled sweetly.

"Great, wonderfully done. I saw Xander at his job when he came in for his shift, he looked absolutly miserable. Alright, what about the other thing?"

"You mean the other way back? Oh, took care of that easily! I came over and used that sob story. Lavender boy went to the kitchen and I went in after him saying I needed some water. So I go in, say there's something wrong with the water, and threw myself on him! Claire came in all upset and I started crying about how he did it and left. So, now you got your revenge on him and Xander."

"God I am so happy I met you." Chad kissed her. "That bastard is never getting back now."

"Aren't you glad I found that book earlier, too?" Elimy pecked his lips.

"Of course."

"I am so happy we were both walking that night."

"I'm happier that you were leading Xander on. To think we would be just friends if it weren't for that fight..."

"Chad, we should get married! We could go to Las Vegas or something."

"Not yet, Eli! We still have to make sure our plan goes through. I'll teach that son of a bitch to steal C from me!"

* * *

A/N: BET YA DIDN'T EXPECT THAT!!!!!! PLOT-TWIST!

* * *


	27. It's Your Turn

* * *

Disclaimer: Alas, all I own are my characters, Elimy-lousy bitch-, Claire-poor thing-, Chad-prick-, and Greg the Kitten!

A/N We all hate Elimy and Chad now, don't we?

Preview: So you're not a fucking womanizer, fucking being one of the keywords?

Chapter 27 It's Your Turn

* * *

Rai, Xander, and Crims banged on Claire's bedroom door.

"Claire, we forgive you!" Crims shouted.

"We know where the necklace is!" Rai continued.

"It was all a lie!" Xander finished.

Vaati sighed. "Nice try but she probably won't open that do-"

The door swung open to show a complete wreck.

Claire's hair was messy, her eyes were bloodshot, snot ran out of her red nose, and she couldn't even form two words. She grabbed a shoe and threw it at Vaati.

"Son of a bitch!"

The three friends walked into her room and as Vaati followed, the door slammed shut in his face.

Crims and Xander sat on the floor while Rai sat on the bed with an arm around Claire.

"Elimy came over to say hi to me when I was here. She had to use the bathroom and then leave...I didn't think anything of it." Xander looked down. "I'm sorry."

"While I was getting an ice cream cone I saw the bitch with your necklace on. She stole it and about fifteen minutes ago, Xander got a call that she was breaking up with him." Rai shook her head.

Claire looked up at the two. "I...is that true?"

"No it's all an elabrate lie." Crims replied sarcasticly.

"That bitch came over here and blamed Vaati for kissing her. I thought it was him...she really did throw herself on him." She sobbed. "I fucked up. He'll leave and hate me for the rest of his life."

"You know, that might not be so long, his life I mean." Crims tried to cheer her up.

Instead it made her cry harder.

Rai shot her a look.

"What, I was just trying to make her feel better!"

"Crims, I hearby condem you to the Witch Trails next week." Xander spoke up.

Claire stood up and opened the door. Vaati's eyes were glaring at her the minute the door swung open.

"So you're not a fucking womanizer, fucking being one of the keywords?"

"Oh, I am a womanizer. But I did not do anything with that...for lack of a better word, slut."

"That lactose intallarant bitch!" Xander grinned. "She probably didn't even like cheese and crackers."

"Come on guys, we got a necklace to find!" Claire shouted.

"I say we split up." Rai suggested. "I'll go with Claire. Crims you stay here incase she tries to get in again. Vaati and Xander you guys go together."

"Good idea." Claire nodded.

--

The two girls walked down the streets, whistling causally as they went until they spotted a string of pink hair under a cap.

"There she is." Claire whispered.

"You follow her and I'll go tell the others, alright?" Rai whispered back.

"Alright."

--

"Here's a llama there's a llama, everywhere a llama llama." Xander sang.

"Would you just shut up?" Vaati shot back.

"I missed you!" Xander hugged him.

Suddenly the oldest boy's eyes flared up.

The Wind Mage seemed a bit frighteened by this sudden change, as he backed up a bit. "What's wrong?"

"I think I just saw Chad. I'm going to go follow him. Why don't you go head on back to the house and stay with Crims?" He was gone before Vaati could answer.

--

"CRIMS ARE THE BOYS HERE? I CAN'T FIND THEM!" Rai's frantic voice yelled as she walked into Claire's house.

She felt something touch her head and immediatly froze.

"Sit on the couch." A familiar male's voice spoke.

Slowly, Rai shuffled her feet and sat down on the couch. She looked behind her to see Chad holding a gun to her head. "You crazy bastard."

"I'm not letting him get away." Chad shrugged. "Even if it means I go to jail."

"You'd kill us all?"

"I never did like you anyway."

"Where's Crims?"

"She's a bit tied up at the moment."

"WHAT DID YOU DO TO HER?!"

"It's your turn."

* * *

A/N Sorry Crims, I know you're a good fighter but...he has a freakin' gun! I mean, A GUN!

Where's Vaati, Xander, Claire, and Elimy? JUST WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON!?!

* * *


	28. Skank Whores Ho

* * *

Disclaimer: Alas, all I own are my characters, Elimy-lousy bitch-, Claire, Chad-phsyco prick-, and Greg the Kitten!

A/N Sorry WereVamp that you have a gun to your head. Now you're my Sissy with a gun to your head, sweet! ^_^

Preview: They call me a slut? Lousy prostitute skank whore.

Chapter 28. Skank Whores Ho!

* * *

Claire had followed Elimy to Chad's home where she awaited on the front porch.

Now was the best time to shrike, Rai or no Rai. "Give me back my fucking necklace."

Elimy looked startled by her voice and shrank back when she saw who it was. "What necklace?" She asked in a meak voice.

"My freakin' tri-force necklace."

"O-o-oh that necklace." She laughed nervously. Her hands trembled as she took it off her neck. "I-I-I didn't like it anyway."

"Next time you throw yourself on my boyfriend, I will fuck you up SO bad that you won't be able to tell when you're having your period." Claire pulled her arm.

Elimy nodded frightened.

"They call me a slut? Lousy prostitute skank whore." She walked off.

--

Vaati was just about to open Claire's front door when he felt someone grab his shoulder. He jumped and turned around to face a very pale Xander. "What the hell are you doing?!" He hissed.

"I-I lost him, he knew a shortcut to Claire's place. I think he's got my cousin." He looked just about ready to cry. "We've gotta save her!"

"He'll kill me if I step in there." Vaati grimaced.

"Then we'll wait for Claire and Rai to get back with the necklace!"

* * *

"Xander, Vaati, have you guys seen Rai? I thought she went to look for you guys." Claire walked up to the two.

"Son of a bitch, the bastard's got her too!" Vaati cursed.

"...What bastard?" She gulped.

"Chad's got my cousin and most likely Rai." Xander began to cry.

"He's...he's holding them hostage?"

"We're fucked. He's going to kill me." Vaati held his hand.

"Not if you have the necklace!" Realization dawned on Claire. She grabbed the necklace out of her left pocket and slowly handed it to Vaati. "Don't kill him."

* * *

A/N: OH MAN, SO LITTLE CHAPTERS LEFT! Wow, Chad is such a phsyco. Who would have known? This is SO different from my original plot.

* * *


	29. The Big Bang

* * *

Disclaimer: Alas, all I own are my characters, Elimy-prostitute skank whore-, Claire-kickass bitch when she wants to be-, Chad-phsyco prick-, and Greg the Kitten!

A/N I SERIOUSLY want to finish this, I'm so excited! I can't wait to get started on my next project. It's not LoZ related-shocking-and has to do with Pixar...Rattioule(sp?)! ^_^ I'm really excited, so let's get this sucker done.

Preview: ...It wasn't freakin' loaded? What a prick.

Chapter 29 The Big Bang

* * *

Vaati felt like a thousand bucks, as cliche as it sounds. He held the necklace in his hands and felt reconnected with nature. Everything seemed a little brighter. The sense of knowing he could kick anyone's ass made him want to test it out. And right now there were two teenaged girls being held hostage.

What better way to test it out?

"You alright, buddy?" Xander asked.

He laughed a bit insanely, making the two look at him oddly. "I'm feeling wonderful."

"...Dude, I think he's lost it."

"Vaati, please don't kill Chad." Claire begged.

"No promises."

"PROMISE ME!" She shouted. "PROMISE ME YOU WON'T COMMIT MURDER!"

"Aw screw it, even I couldn't promise that with Chad." Xander rolled his eyes. "Just save my cousin!" He pushed him towards the door.

Without another word, Vaati walked into the house, leaving behind Claire and Xander. He almost immediatly felt cold metal at the side of his head.

"You have about two seconds to live." Chad whispered.

"Quite contrairy." The gun flew out of Chad's hand with a gust of wind. "_You_ have about two seconds to live. Tell me where Rai and Crims are and perhaps I'll let you live."

Chad gulped. "Y-y-you wouldn't kill your best friend, right?"

"Best friend?" Vaati scoffed. "You've tried killing me twice, now. Where the hell are they?"

"T-t-t-they're...they're in the closet."

Vaati grabbed him by the ear and began dragging him towards the closet. He unlocked the door to reveal the two girls tied up. "Well...I could either keep you two in here for another hour or so OR I could be a gentleman and let you out."

Rai stood up and pushed past him, despite the fact her arms were tied up. "Oh shut the fuck up, will you?" Her temper was very high.

Crims got up after her and glared at Vaati. "Make yourself useful and untie me."

He rolled his eyes and their bonds immediatly dropped off them.

"What the hell?" They muttered.

"Oh, Claire..." Rai nodded. "Cool."

Crims walked up to Chad and kicked him where the sun should never shine, the family jewels, the royal balls, or whatever the hell you want to call it. Chad bent over in pain while Vaati laughed at his suspense. "That's for locking me up in there, you bastard." She spat at his face.

"FREEZE, PUT YOUR HANDS UP!"

The girls screamed at the sound of the voice. Until they saw who it was.

"XANDER YOU JACKASS!"

He grinned. "Couldn't help it. Hey, did you do that, Vaati?" He gestured to Chad still bent over.

"Wish I could say I did, sadly your cousin beat me to it."

Claire ran into the room and hugged Vaati. "Oh thank god you're not dead." She looked down at Chad and stepped on his hand.

Chad moaned in pain. Weather that be from the fact that Claire did not love him and loved Vaati instead or the fact that he had just been kicked in the balls, dragged into the room by the ear, and had his hand stepped on. The world may never know.

Vaati pushed Claire away from him. "That prick killing me? I'd love to see him try."

"I did try!" Chad groaned.

"And you sucked at it." Xander pointed out.

"Hey, I'm not postive but I think you have to have bullets for this thing to work." Rai laughed as she picked up the gun.

"...It wasn't freakin' loaded? What a prick." Claire sighed.

"What are you going to tell your parents, Claire?" Crims asked.

"I'm going to tell them the truth, I guess." She shrugged. "No point in lying. Not like I did anything."

"So, you're going?" Xander pipped up.

The room immediatly went quiet with realization.

"I've been gone for too long. I still have to kill that crossdresser." Vaati shrugged.

"So you're still going to..." Claire gulped. "Vaati, why do you have to kill Link?"

His eyes widened. "You know his name? Not one of the legends have his name in them."

"Busted!" Crims whined.

"Yeah...um...I'd rather not explain, alright?" Claire shook her head and sprinted out of the room. She walked back in with her gameboy. "Take it. You'll probably be pissed and a bit freaked but...I really can't talk about it." She handed it to him.

"Uh...thanks."

The time had come to part ways.

* * *

A/N: Two more chapters to go. :'( I'M GONNA MISS THIS STORY! You guys are probably my best reviewers from the Zelda fandom. Anyone who's reading this, if you could perhaps just leave ONE review saying what you think of it, I'd be pleased.

* * *


	30. Parting Ways

* * *

Disclaimer: Alas, all I own are my characters, Elimy-prostitute skank whore-, Claire-kickass bitch when she wants to be-, Chad-phsyco prick-, and Greg the Kitten!

A/N I am only going to ask you one favor for this chapter. Please listen to Imogen Heap's Cumulus-listen to the longest vid you can find-because this song is what fits. I wrote this chapter with this song. This song has kept me writing this thing, besides Sissy, because I wanted to see what I could create with it. Sadly I did not get to write the scene I wanted to. But I think I'll live.

Preview: Please don't go. I'd rather die then see you leave.

Chapter 30. Parting Ways

* * *

Xander pulled Vaati into a hug. "Best friends forever, right?"

"Friends, how's that?"

"I love you too, buddy!" He cried. "Hey if you do manage to take Hyrule over, can you name something after me?"

"How about a dish that's filled with cheese and crackers?"

"You're the best!"

Rai smiled as she pulled Xander out of the way. "It was fun meeting you, Vaati."

"Make sure to give Xander a few therapy sessions, I believe he can use them." He gave a sly smirk.

"Will do." She laughed. "Take it easy, alright? Oh and goodluck with your crossdresser."

Crims patted Vaati. "It was fun kicking your ass."

"When did you do that?" He raised an eyebrow.

"Haircut."

"...You are very lucky that there are witnesses here."

"I know I am." She grinned.

Claire pushed Crims aside and let the tears fall. "I'm really going to miss you."

"I forgive you for the syrup and haircut, if you wanted to know."

"Oh don't be that way, Wind Boy." She laughed.

He gave her a slight kiss. "Untrained slut."

"Fucking womanizer."

"Touchae."

"Please don't go. I'd rather die then see you leave."

"We all have to part eventually. Perhaps one day we will meet again."

"Vaati...take Greg." She handed him the small kitten. "Please."

"Damn fleabags."

"Vaati."

"Fine, I'll take the stupid cat."

She gave him a kiss. "It has been a pleasure."

He sighed. "Good vacation."

"Best summer ever." The others murmured. "Bye."

A white light glowed around him as he began fading. "See you later." In just a second he was gone.

Claire stared at the empty spot in the room and cried while the others did as well, save for Chad.

The sunset's light faded completly and all that was left in the room were the shadows of crying teenagers mixed in the darkness.

They'd rather die then part their ways.

* * *

A/N: One more chapter. :'( This was so sad to write. We'll be parting our ways also, soon.

* * *


	31. Epilogue

* * *

Disclaimer: Alas, all I own are my characters, Elimy-prostitute skank whore-, Claire-kickass bitch when she wants to be-, and Chad-phsyco prick. Vaati now owns Greg the Kitten.

A/N Here it is...

Preview: Life had thrown me some pretty odd events. Guess that's how life is.

Chapter 31 Epilogue

* * *

"We'll miss you, Xander, have fun! You better write." Rai hugged Xander.

"Of course I will." Xander kissed her. "Only if you write back."

"I'll write. I'll even send cheese and crackers." She promised.

"Hurry up, Xander, you'll miss your flight." Crims scolded.

"Always lookin' out for me." He hugged his cousin. "I'm gonna miss you."

"Same here."

"Hey, Claire? LLAMA!" He poked her and ran off.

Claire laughed and gave chase, only stopping when she could not go past the guards. She walked back to the two girls and frowned. "So it's really happening?"

The two nodded sadly.

"The three muskateers." Rai murmured. "We only have a day."

* * *

"Hey, Rai, don't forget us." Claire hugged her. "I'm going to really miss you."

"Same here. But you're not going to get free therapy sessions." She winked.

Crims rolled her eyes. "Free therapy."

The three pulled each other into a group hug and let tears fall silently down their cheeks.

"Visit New York and tell us how the hotdogs are." The two ordered.

"Will do." Rai nodded. "Bye guys."

* * *

Crims grabbed her suitcases and grimaced. "I'm going to hate it. No more good breakfasts."

"I'll send you some baked goods." Claire promised.

She nodded. "I'll send you something cool. Like, maybe I can send you a badge I earn or something."

"Sounds fun."

"Bootcamp, ilk."

"Keep in touch?"

"Of course."

"As the great Xander would say..."

"LLAMA!"

* * *

I am Claire. At age fourteen some pretty weird stuff happened to me that summer. A powerful Wind Mage named Vaati had appeared in my bedroom powerless one night, sweeping me and my friends into an adventure that would change our lives. We became friends with Vaati, all except Chad who tried to kill him twice.

Vaati and I were completly different and yet fell in love. Chad, jelious of our relationship, tried choking Vaati to death. Xander had saved him. I think Xander and Vaati were like brothers to each other, although Vaati would never admit it. In an attempt to get revenge, Chad had a girl by the name of Elimy steal Vaati's only way back and framed Xander.

I presumed Xander had stole it, due to the fact he was the only one who was at my house. I was wrong. Elimy threw herself upon Vaati to sabatoge the other way home, our hidden desires. I don't think we fulfilled them. We were heading there though. After finding out the truth and taking back my necklace we had found out that Chad was holding Crims, Xander's younger cousin whom was like his older sister, and Rai hostage in my home.

We restored Vaati's powers and he managed to free the two girls. He left that day with my kitten, Greg. Chad went to jail for attempted murder, breaking an entry, and harrasment. I think sexual harrasment was tossed in somewhere...Elimy was put in jail for two years due to theivery. Afterwards she got herself knocked up and died from a gas station explosion caused by her ciggerate. Chad died in prison.

Crims went to bootcamp and then became apart of the FBI and possibly MIB if they exist. She currently lives in Washington DC. After moving to New Jersey, Rai made her shitty luck of having everyone so comfortable with talking to her about their problems, into a career. She is now one of the most well know and well paid therapists in North America. She lives in San Francisco once more.

After going to collage at the age of sixteen, Xander became a creator of video games. He has produced over fifty titles of games. Some include of the topics of cheese and cracker eating llamas that are out to destroy the world and of a certain Wind Mage and random friend fighting for justice against phsyco pricks. He and his cousin have made over one hundred titles together. He currently lives in Nervada.

Whatever happened to me? After my friends and I split up I went into a depression and dropped out of school at the age of sixteen. My parents paid for a trip for them all to come back. Rai had held a therapy session with me, Xander had forced me to play a few games with him, and Crims had force me to do push-ups. I believe she just wanted to piss me off.

After their visit, I was fine and went on with life. I joined culinary school. I became a pastry cheif and opened my own bakery in San Francisco. After a few years I moved out of San Francisco and into New York City. I opened a bakery down there. I am visited by my friends twice a month.

Xander is married to a famous model with multi-colored hair. They have three children. One boy and two girls. They named them Vaati, Claire, and Sunbeam.

Rai is married to a journalist. They have two adopted children. Two girls. Elis and Grace.

Crims had a few scandels. She first married a lawyer who turned out to be gay. She promptly shouted denial repeatedly. After a few years she married a milk man. He, too, was gay and turned out to be dating her ex husband. Two years later she found her perfect husband. He had done a few voice overs for video games. He was not gay. They had no children.

I dated a few guys, none that really interested me. I adopted a baby boy and named him Greg.

Vaati had not succeded in his third attempt at taking Hyrule over. Before his nemisis had went for the final blow he had surrendered and helped restore the land so he could save his ass. He went in hidding for a few years with Greg the kitten.

A couple of years after the move to New York I was visited by a rather familiar face. Reunitied, I asked about the consquences. Apparently a few loopholes had been discovered. I have been married to Vaati for the past years. We've had our ups and downs, I've been turned to stone about five times, and everynow and again he'll shake things up in Kansas by sending down some more tornados then nessacary. Greg the cat and Greg the boy had gotten along.

Greg the cat died two years after Vaati returned. Vaati was the most upset about the pet's death. Apparently the two had bonded. We soon had a child of our own. Life had thrown me some pretty odd events. Guess that's how life is. It's extremly unpredictable. Sometimes I wonder if we're quiet that the problems will just stop coming at us. But the problems are always waiting out there. They're always on the horizon, waiting for us to finish one and then bring out the next.

We're never safe from problems. But I don't think I'd like it any other way. Oh and Vaati was more pissed about the gameboy then upset. Sure, my life definatly isn't normal anymore. But I think I'd rather die then have it any other way. I don't think I would have loved life so much if it were different. To think, all I needed was a power crazed husband.

* * *

A/N :'( Happy ending and yet it's so sad. Yes, eventually Rai and Xander broke up. I mean, long-distance relationship. I suggest looking at my profile to see the soundtrack for I'd Rather Die. The two epilogue songs that are play are the last two. I think I like the last chapter the most. They all became succesful-except for Elimy and Chad-and are living good lives. Now here's something special I hope you'll all agree too! I've been keeping this a secret from everyone, including WereVamp.

Souldin-Claire

CrimsonDarkness 0013-Rai

i-wish-a7x-Chad

WerexVampxGirl-Xander

imperial94-Crims

infinitysphere-Elimy

If you choose to accept this mission, you will have till December. Give me your response on if you will do this is or not. You people have been chosen by random pages. It is not favorites. If they do not wish to participate-remember everyone review this chapter for a chance if they decline-you will responded that there is an opening. You have each been assigned an OC to interview. Ten questions. That's it. Just PM me ten questions for your assigned OC. Thanks. ^_^ It was fun writing this, guys. Thank you for everything.

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	32. Interview 1 Crims

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Disclaimer: Vaati owns Greg the Kitten. -_-' GIVE ME HIM BACK!

A/N Interviewer: imperial94. No previews.

Interview #1 Crims

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Crims sat in a chair in a small room that looked like some blind person painted. The room was entirely colorful and didn't match anything. She felt a bit dizzy looking at the walls and turned her eyes onto the interviewer.

"So, Crims, how's it going?" He asked.

"Is that part of the interview?" She shot back.

"No, just a greeting."

"Well let's get this over with!"

"Okay, question number one..." He paused. "If you were a villain how would you plan to take over the world?"

"Oh that's easy." Crims shrugged. "I'd show up on level one and kick the hero's ass after he comes after me because I decided to kill the president and hold the capital hostage."

The interviewer was now sweating. "N-n-next question. Did Xander ever drive you crazy?"

"My older cousin drove me nuts! I mean, don't get me wrong I love him and all but...HE WOULDN'T LET ME NEAR HIS CAT! One day the cat ran away and he blamed me. He said I ate the cat!"

"Do you enjoy a good fist fight as in boxing or UFC?"

"Fist fights. Althought sword fights are cool. Forget it, I love fights in general."

"If Chad didn't have a gun how fast could you have wrestled him to the ground?"

"Two seconds flat. Hell, if I had of known the gun wasn't LOADED I would have had him on the ground two seconds flat. The jerk just tricked me."

"Would you consider yourself the mature one of the group?"

"Me? Sort of. I mean, Rai and Claire are more down to Earth. I'm more into games like my cousin and fights. I've gotten into alot of fights at school and I slacked off a bit. So...I don't think I'm the most mature."

"Would you have rather gone with Vaati to get his hair cut?"

"Yes, I mean, Vaati getting a haircut? Classic comedy. I can just imagine the trouble he put those four through!"

"How do you feel about Claire+Vaati?"

"I think she can do better then that. Nothing against Vaati but...he can be a bit of a douche."

"What the kind of music do you like?"

"I'm into alot of dark stuff. Dark as in really scary sounding, like A Series of Unfortunate Events. I'm into video game music and some other stuff too. I like rocking out. None of that Disney crap for me, thank you very much."

"Do you like your current job?"

"Big time! I work with Xander on games time to time and I'm in the FBI. Did you know there's a real Area 52?"

"Would LOZ be your favorite game franchise?"

"Legend of Zelda, Kingdom Hearts, and C&C Llamas!"

"C&C Llamas?"

"Cheese and Crackers Llamas. It's one of Xander's games."

"Oh...."

"We done?"

"Yeah."

"Thanks."

"Hey would you mind-"

"No way."

"I was going to ask if you could perhaps help me paint this room. It looks like a two year old did it."

"Fine, I'll help."

* * *

A/N: ^_^


	33. Interview 2 Chad

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Disclaimer: Vaati owns Greg the Kitten. -_-' GIVE ME HIM BACK!

A/N Interviewer: i-wish-a7x. No previews. Due to her questions being EXTREMLY hillarious, I let her keep the extra ones. ^-^ I'll do the same for everyone else.

Interview #2 Chad

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Chad sat in a small crimson room with who he presumed to be the most insane woman on the planet.

The moment she had stepped in she had started ranting on about fairies and Vaati.

How anyone could like Vaati was beyond Chad.

"First question...Vaati?" She started.

"Douchebag, jackass, girlfriend stealer, prick-" Insert some more Vaati bashing and you've got his answer. "Asshole-"

"Alright, I get the freakin' point! Why are you such a pussy? You didn't even load the gun!"

"I'm not a pussy! I was just worried it'd go off at C..." His eyes glazed over momentarily.

"Sure you're not..." Under her breath she spoke, "pussy."

"Can we move on?"

"What did you really think was going to happen if you killed Vaati?"

"C would have seen the error of her ways, Xander would apologize for his betrayl, Crims would tell me I was amazing for killing him, and Rai would set a date up for C and I."

"You're fucking bonkers."

"TAKE THAT BACK!"

"What did you really think of Elimy?"

"I thought she was a whore who could help me get revenge."

"WOMANIZER! And it's not even like you're a COOL womanizer like Vaati!"

"I AM NOT A WOMANIZER!"

"DENIAL! Next question. Are you really a raging homosexual and the real reason you were mad was because Vaati denied you?"

"WHAT?! I'M NOT GAY! AND IF I WERE, VAATI IS NOT MY TYPE!"

"...Does that mean you're gay?"

"Get back to the interview." He ordered through clenched teeth.

"Or were you mad at Xander thought Vaati was cool and you were jealous due to your large crush on Xander and think his obsession with cheese and crackers is cute?"

"FOR THE LAST TIME, I'M NOT FREAKIN' GAY!"

"Okay so if you're not freakin' gay are you JUST gay?"

"INTERVIEW!"

"Alright...how did you feel after your whole group left you for Vaati, mostly due to your assholeness/prickness?"

"I felt lonely and angry."

"Why don't you like the name Greg? It's a way better name for a kitten."

"...I like the name Greg but it just meant she didn't love me."

"Do you ever play the Zelda games-Fourswords and Minish Cap in particular-just to beat the shit out of Vaati?"

"I've only played the ones with Vaati and yes, I play those just to fuck him up."

"See, isn't it better to get that off your chest?"

"What?"

"That you're gay."

"NEXT QUESTION!"

"Are you sure you're not gay?"

"YES I'M SURE!"

"Why is it so hard for you to admit Vaati is way cooler then you?"

"He is not cooler then me, he's just a nutjob bent on taking over the world."

"Look who's talking. Lastly, how has jail been? How many times have you been raped? Was it worth it?"

"Jail sucks. I really wish I could say zero times honestly. No it was not worth it."

"See you later, I guess." She stood up. As she was walking out of the room she kicked him inbetween his legs, sending him down to the ground in pain. "Phsyco Prick."

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A/N: Hope you all enjoyed it.


	34. Interview 3 Claire

Disclaimer: I own almost everything.

A/N: Interviewer: Souldin. No previews. By the way, all of these interviews do not take place in the series, anywhere. They're just for fun. ^_^ If they WERE to take place anywhere, this takes place shortly after the epliogue.

* * *

Claire stared at her Gameboy in a bit of awe as she had just finished Minish Cap while waiting for her interviewer. Despite the fact that her boyfriend was Vaati, she had been very happy to seal him off in that sword.

"That is for making it take twenty-nine times!" She shouted at it, breaking the sudden silence.

The door slammed open and shut, a male sitting down quickly in a seat. "Sorry for the wait, traffic and all."

"No problem."

"How do you think things would have gone if Vaati never came to your world?"

"I think I would have married Chad." She frowned at the thought. "I'd probably be dead from suicide."

Souldin blinked but shrugged it off as PMSing. "What is your favorite game?"

"Life."

"Life sucks, everyone knows that."

"No, not that Life, the BOARDGAME."

"Aha, sorry. What was your reaction to the news of both Chad and Elimy's deaths?"

"Well, Vaati was back around that time. It was more shock than anything, because I was worried he killed them."

"What was running through your mind when you saw Vaati again?"

"'When'd he get so tall?'"

"Did you ever find out why Vaati became a villian?"

"No, he doesn't share much about his past. Actually, he doesn't share anything."

"Did you prefer how Vaati looked before or after his haircut?"

"I think he looks good either way...but the few inches off make him look really good."

"If someone had told you about all this before it had happened what would you have thought?"

"I would have thought they were Cucco for Coco Puffs, on dope, smoking a bit too many Lucky Charms."

"You fell in love with Vaati quite quickly, is there a reason as to why you fell in love so quickly?"

"I think it was the sense of danger or maybe it was because we were completly different. Then again, we did bond a bit and he'll say whatever he thinks. For example, I asked the typical question of 'do I look fat in this' yesterday and he told me that I did."

"Isn't that rude, though?"

"Hey, you didn't see me wearing a red dress to dinner last night, did you?"

"As you're married to a villian, would that make you a villian as well or more of an accomplice to a villian?"

"I find that offensive! Vaati's not so bad, anymore. Sure he'll send a couple tornados down Tornado Alley but that's pretty much it. I've never done anything bad except curse, sex, and the occasional selfish impulse...oh and hit. But I've never stolen or killed a person! Therefore, I am not a villian. Nor am I an accomplice because I never help out with his little dirty deeds."

He tried to ignore the fact that he had just got her a bit pissed. "Has anyone seen Vaati and said "you look like Vaati" or "Hey, its Vaati" or anything else along those lines?"

"Actually, yeah. Everynow and again someone will say something like that and we'll just say he's a cosplayer that likes to stay in costume...well, minus his old outfit. A couple of people try to take picture with us and one year I forced him to go as himself and Xander went as Link for Halloween. Vaati was pretty pissed. I went as the Blue Maiden, under Xander's orders, and Crims went as the Red Maiden, Rai went as the Green Maiden, and Elizabeth-Xander's girlfriend- went as the Yellow Maiden."

"...Wow."

"So, is that it?"

"That's about it."

"Sweet!"

"Thanks for covering that all up."

"No problem."

As the interviewer left, Claire looked around the room in distaste. "Hmm...maybe I should paint it."

In a couple of hours, the room would be yellow.

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A/N: Oh, Souldin, good news. More about Vaati's past-Vaati's past in general-shall be released in the sequal. My friend, werexvampxgirl, and I have been RPing for the past couple of days and thanks to her, I've come up with an idea on how I'll do it. ^_^ Warning: It will be weird.


	35. Interview 4 Elimy

Disclaimer: I own only Elimy.

A/N: Interviewer: infinitysphere. No previews. Infinity wrote this up, not me. I must thank Infinity for this because, due to my busy schedule, this would have taken about two weeks to type up. So, clap and bow for the all amazing Infinity! (Holds gun to your heads) I SAID CLAP, DAMN IT!

Note: Takes place during epilogue.

* * *

I walked down the jail corridor, and the warden pointed me to a cell, a small grey walled room with grilled doors. I could see a figure with electric blue hair inside.

"That's her, in here for theft. Why did you want to see her again?" the warden asked.

"I'm a journalist. Someone in my office, a Miss Hytwilian who knows her, recommended that I interview her. She's been involved in a recent…incident." I replied. The warden nodded and unlocked the grill door.

"I'll give you about five minutes. Careful. She's a bit of kleptomaniac." I walked in.

"Hello." Elimy said, looking up. Her electric blue hair was slightly painful to look at.

"Hello. As you probably know, I'm here to interview you about the whole Vaati incident," I said, sitting on one of the hard chairs in the room. Her eyes flashed.

"That - " Then she noticed my watch. I cursed and pulled my arm back as she dived for it. Kleptomaniac was right.

"Stop, or I'll call the warden," I said firmly. She returned to her chair grudgingly. I was more than a bit unnerved at this point.

"So…to begin. Did you really like Xander or were you just using him?"

"Well, I found him cute at first…but then, no, I think I liked Chad better. And Xander had this obsession for crackers and cheese."

"You said you liked crackers and cheese."

"I lied."

"Ah. So what did you see in Chad?"

"He's a good kisser. And he hated Vaati too," she said dreamily. I moved a bit backwards.

"Why did you hate Vaati?"

"I don't know, just did. And he made Chad angry too…"

"So you liked Chad because he hated Vaati, and you hated Vaati because Chad hated him too."

"That's about it."

"I see. So why did you agree to steal the necklace?"

"Obviously so I could get back at Claire…and Vaati. Don't like either. And Chad wanted me to do it."

"It didn't occur to you that stealing the necklace – and making Claire and Vaati hate each other – would prevent Vaati from returning to his world, therefore keeping him here and causing you even more annoyance?"

"No…" she said, uncertainty showing. "But how did it matter? As long as they weren't together."

"So why did you dump Xander like that? And put on such an act?"

"What is with you and obvious questions? I met Chad in the woods after I started dating Xander and I liked him better. I also needed to steal the necklace somehow, and pull it off. And if Vaati and Claire fell in love, Chad said Vaati would be free to return home. And we couldn't have that, could we?"

This girl was really creeping me out.

"One last question. What's with the hair, and the hat?"

"That's actually two."

"Whatever."

"The hair, I liked the brown-blonde-pink, but then thought electric blue would be better," she said, twirling it.

"And the hat?" I asked, repulsed.

"Bobo? Found it at a fair. I talk to it sometimes, just to freak people out."

"Okay. You've succeeded. Thank you for your time." I said, leaving quickly, and making sure my wallet, keys and watch were all in the same place they had been on entering.

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A/N: Why is it that when she says "And we couldn't have that, could we?" makes me think of Mrs. Lovett and Sweeney...? Hmm...perhaps it's because they're all insane? Aw well!

Give it up for Infinity! (Is holding a machine gun, now) I SAID GIVE IT UP, BITCHES! (Shoots)


	36. Interview 5 Xander

Disclaimer: Vaati owns Greg the Kitten. -_-' GIVE ME HIM BACK!

A/N: Well, since only two of my friends haven't interviewed, they've got until January 13th. Well, Crimson only does. XD I apologize for IRNG not getting updated on Thanksgiving. I was too busy. ANYWAY...I'm thinking of writing a mini story that involves when Vaati got back. What do you guys think about that? Interviewer: WereVampGirl. No previews.

Interview #5 Xander

* * *

Xander bounced a super bouncy ball off the walls while playing with a Yo Yo in his left hand, when the door opened to reveal a flustered girl.

"Sorry I'm so late. I forgot all about the in-"

"Did you bring the goods?"

A confused look came across the girl's face. "What goods?"

"Cheese and Crackers, duh."

"Oh. Here." She handed them over.

"DO DO DO DO!" He held them up triumphantly while she laughed.

"That brings us to my first question. What started your love for Cheese and Crackers?"

"Crims gave me a bath filled with cheese. She got in a load of trouble and I ate the entire bathtub with crackers."

"Including the tub?"

"No, my parents said that I'd die from it. But I did eat a scarf, once!"

"Yeah, I heard about that. What's your favorite TV show?"

"Toyko Mew Mew! ...No, um...Death Note? Er...Inuyasha? Um...Naruto? Fullmetal Archemist? You know what....I really don't know. OH, MERMAID MELODY!"

"...Sometimes I'm just too tired to ask. Favorite colour?"

"Orange."

"Favorite website?"

"Cheese and Crackers Porn dot webz."

"Do you have a not so average story besides the one with Vaati?"

"Well, there was this one time when I was like six. I swear that Navi came to my place. I killed her with a fly swatter."

"Nicely done. Your thoughts on potato's mixed with cheese?"

"LE GASP! ONLY CHEESE AND CRACKERS MAY KICK ASS! Um...but potatoes are good, too, with cheese so...it's alright. I like cheese and scarfs!"

"Can you speak any languages and if so what are they? If not what would you like to be able to speak?"

"Twili and Japanese! I don't know why I can speak Twili...." His eyes shifted mysteriously.

"What instruments? If not what do you wish you could play?"

"I can play the Spork!"

"Do you watch raindrops go down a window and secretly root for one to beat the other? If yes, do you ever win?"

"No, I don't secretly root for one to beat the other. I whoop really loud and name them but I never win."

"Your favorite fictional character?"

"Midna! I'd annoy the hell out of her if I were her bigger brother." Shifty eyes again.

The interviewer got out of chair and glanced at her watch. "Wow, it took me that quick to ask these?"

"WALLA WALLA BANG BANG!"

O_o

^_^

"Well, it was nice meeting you, Xander."

"HYAH!"

She shrugged and left the room.

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A/N: 8D


End file.
